Category: News In Your Briefs
Scientists determine 87% of people who put their hands in the air actually don’t care
The other 13% are easily influenced by crowds.
Ten Ways to Know You Have Writer’s Block
1.
New Photo Surfaces of Early Duck Dynasty Clan Beach Party
cc Shown are Willie, Jase and Jep with wives Korie, Missy and Jessica. photo credit: JeepersMedia via photopin
Duck Dynasty Being Sold Down the River by Ming Dynasty
Hey, Duck Dynasty. China called. They want you to pick up the boatload of crap souvenirs you ordered last month. Duck Dynasty paraphernalia isn’t flying off Walmart shelves anymore, which means that the warehouse that had once housed only (made…
Baby New Year Found Working in a Chinese Child Labor Camp
2014 will be delayed indefinitely. “I guess I’ll have to cover his damned shift,” grumbled 2013.
Duck Dynasty Christmas Not All It Was Quacked Up to Be
Christmas at the Robertsons’ homes wasn’t as merry and bright as it could have been had it not been for the family’s patriarch, Phil Robertson, spouting off about what he truly believes. Apparently Mr. Robertson didn’t get the memo declaring…
Obama Meets with Republicans; Shows Them His Spine
President Barack Obama finally sat down with John Boehner and Mitch McConnell to discuss how to end the stalemate over the funding of government. Unfortunately, neither side could make the concessions needed to end the standoff. Upon leaving the meeting…
Obama to cut education funding in “polarizing” move
In a highly polarizing move, President Obama announced he is using his executive powers to cut federal education funding by 50% in order to install polarized windows in the White House. When reached for comment, President Obama said: “In order…
Trojan To Market New Product To Reduce Spread Of Idiocy
Trojan, a major manufacture of products designed to prevent the spread of sexual diseases, announced today that they have developed a human sized condom that can effectively prevent the spread of idiocy that is heard on right wing radio shows….
Jodi Arias’s Shocking Sex Claim Stuns Mormon Community
In a trial that has been laced with sexual revelations that have left many scratching their heads, probably the one that caused the most shock in the Mormon community was uttered by the defendant today. Trying to recover from days…