Day: December 15, 2009
London City Targets ‘Lycra Lout’ Cyclists
Rogue cyclists who flout the law while riding haphazardly along the gilded byways of London are to be re-classified as ‘domestic terrorists’ and fined by Westminster Council under plans to crackdown on called “Lycra louts” – with rumours abounding that…
House GOP Deny Irrelevancy: “Bull Nipples Would be VERY Useful”
Washington, DC: Congressional Republicans reacted angrily today at accusations of abject incompetence and political irrelevance from both within and outside the party. Republican leaders denied their perceived lack of any direction for the country in terms of ideas or policies…
Nevada’s Chicken Ranch Putting Roosters in the Hen House
Due to new testing methods recently developed to test men’s peckers for STD’s, male prostitutes are slated to join in the chicken dance at brothels across rural Nevada. The owner of the first ranch to offer men up to clients…
Woman Blames Glenn Beck Show for Aging Prematurely
Shelley Saround began noticing her hair going gray about a year ago at the age of 23. In just a few short months, she went from having a head of luxurious dark brown hair to looking like Grandmama on the…
Osama’s Cave Getting Too Crowded
(Information received by word of mouth via the north Pakistan grapevine) Osama bin Laden’s cave has become crowded beyond capacity due to President Obama’s decision to send an additional 30,000 US troops to Afghanistan. Every Taliban member not busy committing…