Author: Tim Jones
Don’t Let Your Dishwasher Destroy Your Marriage
If you’re like my wife, then after you’ve been married for about two years, you probably realize your decision to get married was a serious mistake. Marriage is difficult, especially if your husband is a humor writer or you have…
Marriage Tip: When Black Friday Shopping, Avoid Impulse Purchases
It started out innocently enough. My wife asked me to go to Costco because we were low on shampoo. Perhaps I should not have gone on Black Friday, when Costco had everything on sale. The second I breached the entrance…
Famous Americans Share Thanksgiving Messages of Gratitude
Glossy News interviewed famous Americans this past week, asking them “What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving season?” Here is a holiday gift basket of inspirational messages from some of our nation’s most illustrious, America-loving Americans. Ann Romney, wife of…
Rampant Mourning: Obama Conspires with Hurricane to Steal Election
In what has been the most polarizing campaign since our nation was torn apart by Pepsi’s shocking defeat of Coke in the Pepsi Challenge of 1975, it appears that thanks to an ingenious last-minute October Surprise maneuver, President Obama has…
Reason 17 I’m Voting Romney: I Like His Hair
GlossyNews.com – [Note from the Staff of Glossy News: We proofread the author Tim Jones’ rant below about why he’s switching his vote from Obama to Romney. We uncovered a few minor errors in his analysis and felt compelled to…
Researchers Unlock Key to Happy Marriage: Let Wives Do Housework
Hard to believe? Then maybe you’ll believe a study which concluded that marriages where the women do all the housework while the men retreat to the parlor to smoke cigars, read the newspaper and discuss politics with other men in…
Romney Surging in Latest Poll of Comatose Unregistered Voters
In recent polls, President Obama continues to lead with several key demographic categories: women, blacks, Hispanics, gays, people under 25, people over 25, people who can do basic math, people who can identify Canada on a map, and people who…
Meet Howard & Marjorie Grunfeldt of Pickerington, Ohio – America’s Last Remaining Undecided Voters
With each passing week, the 2012 presidential race is getting tighter and tighter. The most recent Gallup poll has it at 49.99999999% for Romney and 49.99999999% for Obama. A dead heat. Scientists have discovered molecules with more space between them…
Election Update: Romney’s Brilliant Strategy to Win the Election
There are only a few more weeks until Election Day. Polls paint a bleak picture for Romney’s chances of winning the White House – which house is even lovelier than his ski chalet house in Park City, Utah, but not…
Women, Help End Discrimination Against Men … by Getting Struck by Lightning
I am a staunch advocate of women’s rights to equal treatment and nearly equal pay. I’ve even watched Oprah and Ellen on occasion. But please don’t tell my golfing buddies. They would never understand. There is no denying that women…