Author: BobZaguy
Santorum: ‘In It … To Win It’
GMA NEW YORK —BobZaguy GMA NEW YORK – “We stood up and didn’t back away, we said ‘We’re In It to Win It,’ and we didn’t back down. Really, we didn’t back down,” former Senator Rick Santorum said. No one…
Santorum Claims Name is Century-Old Boner
ON THE ROAD: IOWA —BobZaguy Rick Santorum is said to be making some amazing preparations to formally declare his candidacy for 2012. “I want to say publicly that I will make a major announcement regarding my plans for the GOPTea…
Sarah Palin Flirts with Rare “Fire in Belly” Bug
FOX NEWS, NEW YORK CITY — GlossyNews.com Former governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin, admitted to Greta van Susternen on her FoxNews show that she is suffering from the rare GOPTea political virus called “fire in belly”, or in beltway-speak: FIB.
Wills and Kate® (Patent Pending)
LONDON (AP) — GlossyNews.com – Wills and Kate®, a royal pair if ever there was one, is the official copyrighted name of the British Royal Family’s new world tour idea. Set to run through 2011, the tour will begin in…
Usama bin Laden, a Touching Eulogy
VARIOUSLY AROUND D.C. — GlossyNews.com Trump is really pissed — he felt that only 8 years of ‘Mission Accomplished’ was not long enough to have any impact. He said, “America needs a real someone to hate. I thought I had…
GOP Considers Rebranding as “Social Tea Party”
Des Moines, IA —GLOSSY NEWS With 2011 barely into its 4th month, House Tea Party Caucus leader Michele Bachmann whipped her Iowa audience into a frenzy over light bulbs, gay marriage and abortion with her stump “Social Conservatism is Physical…
Mama Grizzly Prowls AOL w/ Mixed Success
NEW YORK, NY —Glossy News Dumpster diving in New York City the other day brought up this quite wrinkled but interesting tidbit – a résumé cover letter to: Top Mama Grizzly A. Huffington; cc: T. Armstrong — AOL From: First…
Al Qaeda Confirms Bin Laden Dead; Organizational Changes
CAIRO — Al Qaeda issued this statement to Internet militant websites: “We regret to announce that our Premier Leader, Usama bin Laden was killed Monday in plain sight at his home in the city of Abbottabad, Pakistan.
Tea Party Rebukes Bachmann for Un-Christian Breaking Wind Incident
WASHINGTON DC — GlossyNews.com Minnesota GOPTea Bagger Rep. Michelle Bachmann broke wind yesterday in what was described as a home accident. She and her staff immediately flew to Washington DC where she announced the cancellation of her April appearances in…
RNC Funding Calls for Chairman Neuvo, Hold the Mexican
Want to be the next chairman of the Republican National Committee? Take this easy essay test and send it back to the RNC in Washington. Be sure to include all your contact info so we can get in touch if…