GlossyNews.com – What started off as a smooth election day in Florida turned ugly in the second hour of voting. Machine failures were reported across all counties and voters were forced to wait for hours in the hot sun for the issue to be resolved.
The problem can be traced directly back to future felon and Governor Rick Scott. In his apparent reluctance to use any source of energy that doesn’t require the consumption of limited fossil fuels, he issued an executive order earlier this month requiring that black electrical tape be placed over the solar panels on all machines.
RIGHT: Tyrell Jackson, a noted “problem blacks” and would-be Florida voter, has been waiting in frustration at this Florida polling place for more than two-hours, seemingly unaware that there is a giant penis scrawled on the chalkboard behind him. (CLICK PHOTO TO ENLARGE)
Unfortunately for the voters in the state, these panels provide the electrical energy needed for the machines to operate. This tragic turn of events is especially ironic given that the state is known as the Sunshine State.
Read Also:
– Romney Camp Launches Last Minute “Why Vote?” Ad Blitz
– Election Day 2012: Obama Starts Cleaning Out the Oval Office
– Return of the Bride of ‘He Who Shall Not Be Named’
– Local Man Ready to Get Out There and Make His Terrible Decision Count
– Pennsylvania Poll Workers Suspiciously Republican
– “Well-Hung Chad” Having Banner Day at Florida Poleing Station
– This Election Day: Don’t Vote, Stay Home and Pray
In response to being flooded with complaints from the very voters who the governor had allowed to vote, he sent his assistant out to blow sunshine on the machines. This has left Governor Scott with no one at this time to blow it up his ass.
At this time the voting has resumed and Governor Scott has begun the process of laying blame on unidentified junior members of his staff.
Renewable energy, red-state jokes always crack me up.