Day: February 15, 2010
Rising Porn Star Admits to Using Performance-Enhancing Altoids
SAN FERNANDO, CA — Up-and-coming porn starlet Corrine Hard was rapidly becoming a household name until she received a summons to appear before a Congressional Grand Jury to testify about her alleged use of performance enhancing drugs.
Fat People Outraged at Having to Pay for Two Plane Seats
New York, NY Following the recent onslaught on fat people to pay for two seats for a one way, economy class flight, fat people all over the world have finally decided enough is enough with this anatomical discrimination. Trent Budgwood,…
SCOTUS rules Black History Month ‘Getting Old, Fast’
Washington DC By the narrow margin Court watchers have come to expect, the Supreme Court ruled today that Black History Month should “get over itself already.” In the five vote majority opinion, Justice Clarence Thomas wrote, “There is no Constitutional…
Royal Caribbean Announces Educational “How the Other Half Live” Vacations
LABADEE, Haiti — There’s an old Haitian proverb: “Behind the mountains, there are mountains.” Behind those mountains are smaller mountains. Behind those smaller mountains is an enclosure. And behind that enclosure is a tropical paradise rented out to Royal Caribbean…