Naughty Mr Pelican

A funny old bird is the pelican

His beak holds more than his belican

He can take in his beak enough food for a week

I’m damned if I know how the helican

A Marriage of Inconvenience

A man with the surname of Bebee

Wished to marry a lady named Phoebe

But he said, “I must see

What the minister’s fee be

Before Phoebe be Phoebe Beebee.”

An accident really uncanny

Occurred to my elderly granny;

She sat down in a chair

While her false teeth lay there

And bit herself right in the fanny!

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