The public posturing of Israel and Palestine continued to escalate as pressure mounts for the long-time rivals to return to the negotiating table. Earlier last month in an address to a joint session of Congress, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu laid out his plan for peace, surprisingly agreeing to return to the pre-1967 borders, to halt all settlement building, and to pay reparations to the refugees and their descendants. Read the full story

Tel Aviv, IA -(Glossy News) Mourners filled the office of Zion Shipping Lines after news of the first Israeli cruise ship, the Moe Weiner, was reported foundering in rough waters in Lake Champaine in upstate New York.

According to several eyewitnesses, the Moe Weiner hit a partially submerged object. Later identified as a possible Golberg, the heavily laden cruise ship began sinking almost immediately. Read the full story

WASHINGTON, D.C. (GlossyNews) — Cantankerous malcontent and ex-reporter Helen Thomas, who recently had an unfortunate run-in with the Jewish-owned American media when she accidentally reminded everyone that Palestine is an occupied territory, is the latest celebrity forced to wear the scarlet letter “A.” A for Anti-Zionist. Read the full story

Washington, D.C. (GlossyNews) -– Fur continues to fly over what some claim are very divisive comments by White House reporter Helen Thomas regarding Israel’s presence in Palestine. While Helen has apologized to everyone regarding the flap, the issue is just not going away and now she is losing speaking engagements because of it. Thomas is reportedly blaming a certain satire site for the insensitive comments made on video. Read the full story

“Oy vey, what a schmuck,” said one man as Israelites far and wide kvetshed about this latest development.

FUTUREFILE Israel, 2023 – The world’s last Palestinian, an old female named Afnan, has died in an Israeli zoo, eliminating the chance that any Arab will ever again be referred to as a “Palestinian.”

Back in 2016, Afnan was found clinging to a crushed olive tree on land she claimed belonged to her grandfather. She was eventually brought to the zoo by an humanitarian group investigating war crimes against Israel during a recent dust-up between the two parties, that killed every wild Palestinian in the Gaza strip and West Bank and left scores of Israelis with minor injuries. Read the full story

The lessons that can be drawn towards the current Middle-East Peace Process

The nuclear alert was based on a diplomacy-supporting stratagem Nixon called the Madman Theory, or “the principle of the threat of excessive force.” Nixon was convinced that his power would be enhanced if his opponents thought he might use excessive force, even nuclear force. That, coupled with his reputation for ruthlessness, he believed, would suggest that he was dangerously unpredictable and win favorable conditions on the negotiation table during the Vietnam War. He and Henry Kissinger commanded the military in Vietnam during his term in the White House to “send anything that flies, against anything that moves.” Read the full story

Israeli Defence Minister Barak (Hey – coincidence or what – he and the all-new American President share a common name) has voiced Tel Aviv’s concern about the positive progress in talks between Iran, the IAEA and major world powers on Tehran’s purported weapons of mass distraction program in Vienna this week. Read the full story

The top nuclear inspector at the UN told reporters from the Warmongers Gazette he does not believe that Iran is a threat to Middle Eastern peace and stability but conversely claims that Israel is the number one menace due its expansionist policies and covert nuclear weapons arsenal. Read the full story

Jerusalem – Israeli Health officials have announced today that the swine flu vaccine will not be made available to the general public as punishment for the more than 1,700 people who went against Hebrew law by contracting swine flu. Read the full story

Washington Post Associate Editor Bob Woodward has released another transcript of a recent White House strategy session, this one devoted to the looming Iran-Israel confrontation. Read the full story