Forget Doctors. I’m Getting Tested at Home!

Forget doctors. I’m getting tested at home

No one likes a trip to the doctor’s office. They are scary and weird and, worst of all, they smell like doctor’s offices. Luckily, there is now a way you can take the incredibly important, life or death procedures that you used to have to go to the doctors for and do them at home!

No more germy waiting rooms, annoying small talk, or angry receptionists to deal with. Just important medical procedures shipped or brought right to your home and done without a professional in sight. What could go wrong?? So if that’s a case then check this website to test your food intolerance level and how to avoid that.

 Cutting out the middleman 

In the past, there has been a tried and true process involved in finding out if you have anything wrong with you. First, you think something might be wrong. Second, you go to the doctor and they poke you and prod you then stick you with a giant bill at the end. Finally, after you have paid the bill in full, they will grace you with their knowledge of if, in fact, there is something wrong with you.

Yes, this system does work in general but it does not seem like the most effective and efficient way to figure out if you have a health problem. It is expensive, time-consuming, and ultimately you have to rely on someone else to get everything right so you know you are or are not sick.

With the advent of modern technology, companies have been working on products to cut out that middleman (or woman) and get you results about your health right from the comfort of your own home. It means the power is with you and nobody else (except probably lab techs at the home testing company) needs to be involved. Here are some of the most interesting and innovative home health testing products.

 Shake your family tree

One of the best and most comprehensive at-home medical tests comes in the form of a DNA test. Yes, these tests will probably tell you that you are 1/27,000 Armenian and they may be used to catch your creepy uncle who is probably a serial killer, but they go way beyond that.

 These personal DNA testing kits can actually tell you a lot about your health, specifically, what sicknesses and diseases your genes say you will be more prone to. They can also tell you what problems your genes may carry on to your children and even what your current lifestyle choices are doing to your health.

 There are many of these tests on the market and, generally, the most well-known ones are the better ones. There are some, however, that are more expensive and, as proclaimed by them, more in-depth and accurate. To decide for yourself, check out CNN’s list of top home DNA tests. 

Watch out for the C-word

There is one C-word that no one wants to hear. Ok, maybe there are two but the one we are discussing here is cancer. This horrible disease is something that no person wants to deal with but the truth of the matter is, the earlier you catch cancer, the easier it is to treat, and the better chances you have of beating it into remission.

The verdict is a bit mixed on this type of home screening. Some people think that the DNA-style tests which only say you have a higher risk can cause unnecessary fear while others think it is a great first step towards early detection. 

In 2018, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved the first at-home testing kits with no medical provider approval needed. These kits test for genetic markers of three rare BRCA 1 and BRCA 2 genetic mutations which are known to significantly raise the risk of breast and ovarian cancer in women and in some cases, men too with both breast and prostate cancer.

Whether or not this type of testing us ultimately good or not, the fact that the power is now in the people’s hands is at least an encouraging development.

 Go gluten-free 

I know you may not believe me but, some people who claim to be gluten-free actually have a disease and aren’t just picky and annoying. It’s true! Celiac disease is a real thing and can cause real problems for people who suffer from it when they eat foods with gluten in them.

To help these people determine if they have a disease or are just obnoxious a company called imaware™ has created a home Celiac Disease test that will help people find out the truth once and for all. 

With a simple finger prick, you can find out from the comfort and privacy of your own home whether or not you have an issue with gluten. It is great for your health and for your wallet as the test is less than 100 bucks. It is a win-win situation all around.

 A test for everything

These are just a few of the big, at-home tests on the market today. There are plenty more as well. A quick search will show that there are tests that will allow you to get a better handle on your health right from home that includes all sorts of common and no-so-common issues.

Some of the additional at-home tests you will find include tests for allergies, HIV, drugs in your system, strep throat, cholesterol, thyroid issues, urinary tract infections, STDs, and a whole lot more. They are pretty much all available to get mailed right to your doorstep and many are even carried at local pharmacies and grocery stores.


Even with these tests, you still may have to visit a doctor at some point because, as great as these tests are, there are not many at-home treatment kits for all these diseases and health problems. Plus, even if an at-home test confirms that you have an issue, it is always best to get a second opinion from a trained professional.

The point is though, at-home tests are the wave of the future and they help put more privacy and control back into the hands of the individual instead of the medical profession.

Author: Brian White

Brian first began peddling his humorous wares with a series of Xerox printed books in fifth grade. Since then he's published over two thousand satire and humor articles, as well as eight stage plays, a 13-episode cable sitcom and three (terrible) screenplays. He is a freelance writer by trade and an expert in the field of viral entertainment marketing. He is the author of many of the biggest hoaxes of recent years, a shameful accomplishment in which he takes exceptional pride.