Journalist Undercover in “Gay Conversion” Clinic finds Methods Shocking

Pat Jacobs, a long-time critic of LGBTQ proponents, chose to silence xer YouTube channel last year to go undercover to see how the so-called “Gay Conversion” clinics actually operate. What xhe found may shock you to your very core, or not, depending on if you know anything about these places.

“I’m going in with an open mind,” said Jacobs last Spring, before paying the $96,450 non-refundable fee to Off Bakkon Broadgay Hospice in Clever Falls, Utah. “But I fully expect these people are going to try to brainwash me.”

As it turns out, brains are not merely washed in OFBH, but purged of all evil spirits, devils, demons, and simple neuron functions.

Jacobs came out changed indeed, shocked to the very core.

“I can’t… it’s… the sun looks good today,” said Jacobs, with fresh temple burns from off-license sorts of electro-therapy which can only be described as unethical, illegal, and wholly Republican.

Jacobs went home to rest, promising a followup to the report after sleeping, but after 48-consecutive hours of zombie-like slumber, we had to go to print.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to xer family, as well as those who think “xer” is a legitimate pronoun, which it isn’t.

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Author: Dexter Sinistri

Dexter Sinistri is a famously centrist writer who has worked as a Hollywood correspondent for a number of leading publications since 2005. Though once a photographer, Mr. Sinistri struck out as a writer on all things celebrity, and he likes to consider himself a tremendous asset to Glossy News, though by most accounts, he has fallen somewhat short of this effort.

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