Conservative/Liberal Brawl: Now Is(n’t) the Time for Gun Control

A liberal and a conservative walk into a bar. The bartender’s like, “what is this, a joke?” Actually it’s quite serious, and it covers a grave topic.

Conservative columnist and pollster Dean Chambers agreed to talk with liberal news man and satirist Dexter Sinistri to discuss the very hot topic of gun control in the United States.

DEAN CHAMBERS – UNSKEWEDPOLLS.COM – Words can not adequately communicate the degree of tragedy of the shooting incident in Newtown, Conn. and we all pray for the families of the victims. However, it is truly sad and showing a lack of civil human reaction to tragedy when the far left exploits an event like this to advance their political agenda of gun control.

Those twenty children and seven adults were killed by a truly sick individual, not guns. This tragedy is vastly unfortunate, but it should also not lead to further encroachment of Bill of Rights recognized civil liberties by calls for further victim disarmament legislation aka “gun control.”

The far left is hell bent on passing more victim disarmament legislation, in violation of the Second Amendment, despite ample empirical evidence that such legislation doesn’t make anyone safer except perhaps the criminals. Needless additional gun laws will only disarm law abiding citizens while doing nothing to stop the actions of criminals who abuse firearms. When the state of Florida banned firearms in rental cars, it lead to an epidemic of carjackings of rental cars.

In Israel, the teachers in the schools carry guns and they never have any school shootings. Guns are used by sick people in these tragedies occasionally while every year hundreds of thousands of law abiding citizens protect themselves with firearms. Why should we disarm the population from protecting themselves because of the actions of the very few sick individuals?

BRIAN K. WHITE – GLOSSYNEWS.COM – This was a horrible event and our hearts reach out to those effected. The left is not exploiting this, the left has been urging gun control for decades. When there is a shooting we hear “now is not the time” and when there isn’t we hear “don’t fix it if it ain’t broke.”

So when can we discuss it? There have been 23 school shootings since 2000, and seven just in the last ten months. Calling gun control “victim disarmament” is dishonest. The bill of rights is 225 years old, and is perhaps ready for a shift in tone, since it says nothing about high-capacity, high-powered weapons.

Typical conservative. Ignore the facts and distort reality to fit your twisted world view. The evidence is clear. Countries without guns have almost no gun deaths. Partial bans, like in Florida, are doomed to fail. We need comprehensive reform. Teachers in Israel are permitted to carry guns, but most do not. Remember, America isn’t Israel. Israel is a war zone.

The only school shooting they had was at the hands of Palestinian extremists. Why should we disarm citizens who are just protecting themselves? Because every week there is a murder where someone tries to claim “stand your ground” when there was no need for violence. Because Newtown school murderer Adam Lanza only had access to guns because his mother was hoarding them in fear.

DEAN CHAMBERS – UNSKEWEDPOLLS.COM – So the left is not exploiting the Newtown, Conn. shooting to engage in a discussion about victim disarmament but then asks what time and occasion conservatives think should be the right time to entertain the idea of victim disarmament. The question isn’t about the time but the utility of what they seek to propose while exploiting quite blatantly the tragedy.

Restricting the Second Amendment rights of individuals, the right to keep and bear arms for self defense, would not in any way prevent another shooting tragedy of this kind. So the point is, having a discussion about a proposal we both know doesn’t work, is a waste of time. Why waste our time debating an idea that doesn’t work, and is also clearly in violation of the Bill of Rights?

Let us instead focus on debating ideas that do work. Encourage the teachers to learn how to shot firearms and carry them in school. If the next shooter even suspects one teacher in that school is packing, the shooter won’t be shooting that school. Let’s push for concealed carry for everyone that has a firearms permit too.

If the shooter has no way of knowing how might be carrying concealed, the shooter won’t open fire at the risky of immediately being snuffed out by someone carrying concealed. Safe and responsible use of firearms should be taught to anyone that wants to learn, so as there are more law-abiding citizens carrying firearms there will be less crime and far fewer mass shooting tragedies.

There you go again. Calling it “victim disarmament”. How dishonest. The second amendment doesn’t allow guns for self defense, but to guard against a government power growing too oppressive. Gun control is not “clearly a violation of the Bill of Rights. Fully automatic weapons are already banned, few seem to think that’s an encroachment. Maybe we should say that only firearms in existence at the signing of the Bill of Rights are allowed, specifically, muskets. Shootings happen every two weeks, so what are we to do?

You think if every teacher had a gun in his/her desk, that one wouldn’t fall into the hands of a disturbed child? That thinking is naive. There is already a world in-carry. Every state in the nation allows concealed carry, and off-duty police are usually required to carry, but the gun violence continues, and has escalated. Armed civilians do not stop mass shootings.

The truth is, the more guns per capita a nation has, the more gun crimes and gun accidents occur. If we can’t ban them outright like England has (see their 55 gun deaths last year against our 12,000) then let’s just require gun owners to carry liability insurance for when their gun is used improperly. I own two guns myself, and if I was required to pay into insurance to compensate the victims, should my guns ever be stolen or “borrowed” by my children, I’d likely be more careful. And rates would vary based on the level of security. With a trigger lock, in a gun safe, would likely be the cheapest rate, and the best for society.

Even the NRA has backed off their hardline stance. This puts you to the right of the NRA. You’re standing in lonely territory. The tide has shifted. It’s time for a reasonable, sensible gun control policy. I advocate a complete ban, even though that would mean financial loss to me. Could you accept an outcome that means a rhetorical loss to you?

Author: Brian White

Brian first began peddling his humorous wares with a series of Xerox printed books in fifth grade. Since then he's published over two thousand satire and humor articles, as well as eight stage plays, a 13-episode cable sitcom and three (terrible) screenplays. He is a freelance writer by trade and an expert in the field of viral entertainment marketing. He is the author of many of the biggest hoaxes of recent years, a shameful accomplishment in which he takes exceptional pride.

7 thoughts on “Conservative/Liberal Brawl: Now Is(n’t) the Time for Gun Control

  1. Bullshit Bargis. The only reason you have an Atom bomb in the first place was because you knew you’d get billions in foreign aid from countries that want to keep you happy enough not to use it. Don’t blame your getaway sticks. It’s the lousy carpenter who blames his tools.

  2. What sort of person needs a rapid fire, many bulleted firearm anyway?
    A soldier yes, a regular citizen no.
    Divide guns into two categories, regular 8 to 10 chambered handguns, hunting style rifles and shotguns.In normal life who really needs more than these?
    Now make a second list- guns with the potential for mass murder, assault guns, machine guns, bazookas, etc. These should never have been allowed in the hands of ordinary citizens in the first place. It is like asking for trouble.
    Or should we just let everyone have their own atom bomb too? How long do you think civilization will last with that?

  3. Sorry to differ but…If the Supreme Court says it’s a right, it’s law.

    Our British relatives are often cited as having a saner society with low gun realted deaths, but things have recently changed in a society that has some of the strictest gun laws on the books. British gun crimes have almost doubled since Labour came to power as a culture of extreme gang violence has taken hold.

    The latest Government figures show that the total number of firearm offenses in England and Wales has increased from 5,209 in 1998/99 to 9,865 last year…a rise of 89 per cent. In some parts of the country, the number of offenses has increased more than five-fold.
    In eighteen police areas, gun crime at least doubled. Last week, police in London revealed they had begun carrying out armed patrols on some streets. The move means officers armed with sub-machine guns are engaged in routine policing for the first time ever.

    Shadow Home Secretary, Chris Grayling, said last night: “In areas dominated by gang culture, we’re now seeing guns used to settle scores between rivals as well as turf wars between rival drug dealers.”

  4. Despite what the right-wing Supreme Court says, the Second Amendment does not give an absolute right to own any gun you want without restrictions. The Founding Fathers included prefatory words in the Second Amendment for a reason.

    Gun control works in other countries and can work in the U.S. as well. We can blame a mentally unbalanced twenty-year-old for this massacre but if the state prevented his nutcase mother from buying dangerous firearms, she wouldn’t have been in a position to take her anti-social son with Asperger’s to a gun range to teach him how to shoot.

    Guns do kill people especially when anyone and everyone can get one.

  5. Very nice pro and con….Since I’m a card-carrying conservative,ex-military firearms expert, here’s my take.

    The murder of these children is horrible. Without doubt violence past the extreme of reality. The real issue isn’t the hardware at all, but what has happened to our citizens during the last 30 years or so. For example:

    When I was in high school, my buddies and I packed our long guns in the trunk of our cars and after school spent a few hours hunting rabbits, pheasant, whatever was in season. Had a disagreement with another student? Involved in a fight? No, we didn’t run to our cars and withdraw a weapon…We slugged it out and usually healed the riff later. Unlocked gun cabinets in other kids homes? Sure! We knew they were off limits and respected them.

    So, what has changed? Guns in homes have been around forever and it’s only been in recent times they’ve been abused to a degree where children are involved in an open season warfare….The person behind the gun has changed.

    Recent university studies by respected behaviorists have proven that our violence plaqued society is a direct result of mass produced media that glorifies violence in order to obtain a suitible and satisfactory outcome to a given situation. Bad guys in the game? Blow them up. Then take a break in the kitchen with a PB&J sandwich and go back and blow some more up.

    Hey! It’s make believe, right? Or is it? A typical gamer plays hardware that rivals military simulators. The adrenaline rush a gamer feels is very close to what a combat soldier feels. This adrenaline release through a person’s system is believed to be the switch that turns Post Tramatic Stess Symdrome in soldiers. Could it effect adolescents as well?

    Movie directors glorify blood letting to such a degree that youngsters are de-sensitized to these events. The average child in America is subject to over 10,000 brutal murders on the TV screen by the time they are 18 years old. Directors like Robert Rodriquez and Quentin Tarrantino (and others) have made personal fortunes feeding gore and brutality to eager viewers looking for their morbid adrenaline rush of beheadings, rapes, maimings and other atrocities that would make even the most hardened Taliban blush.

    If we are to place liability on objects that have no mind-use of their own, perhaps we should allow the victims of drunk drivers to sue Budweiser, or allow plane crash victims sue the Pope since he supposedly has the ear of God himself.

    Basically, you can’t legislate morals and compassion. You can’t pass enough laws to cover everyone’s interests a full 100%.
    More gun laws? There are over 22,000 gun laws on the books in America, yet a deranged individual murdered a bunch of 6 year olds.

    Let’s talk about the shooter’s homelife. The single mother is supported by her ex-husband to the tune of around $280,000 each year. The weapons she had at home…A Glock 10mm would retail for about $800.00….The SIG 9mm would retail for about $1,100.00…The Bushmaster AR variant would retail for about $1,500.00. The question that’s not being asked is, why weren’t these rather expensive weapons in a safe? Certainly she had the income to afford one. Certainly she had an adult male with a very questionable mental state living in her home. The shooter had a long history of mental health issues, a penchant for long hours playing extremely violent computer games, a hatred for his father, and for his mother who had recently revealed to friends (and her son) she was going to commit her son to a mental health fascility.

    What it boils down to in most cases is personal responsibility for whatever you have in your home that can hurt others….Be it a car, a machete, a bow and arrow, a hatchet, or even a loose board on your steps.

    The current mantra is that ‘assault weapons’ are too deadly, not civilized, what do we need them for….’Why I have my trusty 12 guage what do I want with one of those things.’

    The truth of the matter is most anti-gun proponents don’t know what they’re talking about. A typical AR assault rifle look-a-like variant in caliber 5.56 (.22 caliber) with a 30 round capacity magazine can fire each round with a single pull of the trigger. Shoot all rounds downrange fast? About 12 -14 seconds.

    A typical semi-automatic 12 guage shotgun (like the one used to hunt with) loaded with double 0 buckshot. One shot per trigger pull sends 9 each 32 cailber balls downrange. (remember now .22cal VS .32cal) Empty the tubular magazine you’re sending 288 32 cailber projectiles downrange in about 8-10 seconds. This rate of fire exceeds a modern machine gun which averages 600-900 rounds per MINUTE!

    So, anti-gunners with promises of an assault weapons ban are giving you false security. Gun bans do not work in America. Realistically, we can’t stop the flood of illegal drugs into our country, so what’s to stop cartels from throwing a few dozen third-world AK-47’s machine guns along with the ton of narcotics flowing in daily.

    Has the left played this tragedy into a partisan position? Sure have and that’s too bad. The real discussion we need in America is what’s the cause of our violent society. What makes an acne faced post-adolecent so angry, so depressed, so de-sensitized, and so void of self-respect and self-love that he’ll use the blood of others to partner with taking his own life in some cheap movie scenario of going out in a blaze of glory.

    Before you gladly hand another right back to the government, remember this…You never get them back.

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