The first head to head debate between the two US presidential candidates that took place tonight (29 September) was universally declared by political pundits and the media alike as a disaster for President Donald Trump.
In a rare moment of honesty and humility the President admitted he had ‘lost his cool.’
“I was there, sure, but my mind was somewhere else,’ admitted a crestfallen Trump, ‘but my abysmal performance had nothing to do with Biden. My mind was on that Goddamned MAD podcast. If it gets aired I’ll look a complete bozo. I’ll be the laughing stock of America and beyond.”
The President went on to explain that one of his aides had informed him about the upcoming airing of the podcast just as he was entering the debating arena.
“This MAD podcast will be an electoral disaster for me,” barked the president to a wide-eyed press pack after the debate, “I’ve got Rudy Giuliani working day and night to get the frickin’ thing pulled, but so far the swivel-eyed lunatic hasn’t managed to secure an injunction.”
The MAD comedy podcast is a hilarious ten part series of audio broadcasts, each episode being a side-splitting 30 minutes long. The podcast parodies Donald Trump, his family, and other world leaders in a story that may, or may not result in Trump’s caricature, President Donald DUMP – the owner of an empire of luxury prisons fraudulently elected as the US President – bringing the world to the brink of nuclear Armageddon.
Other characters in the podcast include:
Vladiwell Putitin – The gangster president of Russia who is blackmailing Dump.
Mi Hung Long – The president of China who wants to have a cage fight with 1Dump.
Mekanika – Dump’s sex-bot wife.
Satania – Dump’s greedy ambitious, power hungry daughter whose husband is a slithering lizard.
VP Mike Dance – An African American who has to pretend to be white so he can keep his job.
When asked for a comment, a deranged Giuliani mumbled, “If those f*ckers broadcast this MAD series it’ll finish Dump. He’ll look like an even bigger moron.”
When it was pointed out by the cub reporter from the UK comic ‘The Beano’ that he’d just referred to President Trump as ‘Dump,’ Giuliani barked, “So what? The two f*ckwits are virtually indistinguishable!”
Interest in the MAD podcast is reported to be astronomical, and it is expected that the series will go viral worldwide on its release. A movie and TV series is expected as a spin off. Bidding for the rights has already started between major studios, with Danny DeVito, and surprisingly the cartoon character of Peter Griffin clamouring for the lead role of President Donald Jasper Dump.
Melania Trump was asked if she had been approached to play the role of Mekanika. She replied in a simulated robotic voice, “Watch – this – space!”