With Friends Like These? World Dictators Rally Around to Oppose Trump Impeachment

MSNBC, otherwise knows as Fox News for liberals, have come up with a list of inflammatory, controversial and downright flamboyantly evil leaders who have rallied around Donald Trump.

Trump’s anti fake news fan-club have dealt a string of stinging ripostes to those who wish to see the President gone, and indeed off the political scene for good! The latter group is so popular, the website sports betting dime has been monitoring what the odds of impeachment actually are.

‘Fake news,’ a favourite term of Trump himself, has now gained truly global appeal.

Firstly, in the latest annual Cybersecurity and Integrity of Journalistic Standards conference in Vladivostok, Vladimir Putin and the homegrown boss of Vkontakte (the Twitter of Russia) note that the use of well-tamed social media to spread fake news is a typical authoritarian gesture of entrenched, encrusted, corrupted, unaccountable elites. The speech ended with Putin drily noting:

The social media is for the many, and not the few. I cannot for the life of me understand how there are all these corrupt and morally questionable figures who dare to try and weaponise social media against their own people, while cynically crowding out alternative voices. Fake news and fake social media truly are the enemy of the people!

President Bashar al-Assad of Syria notes:

All this anti Trump propaganda is fake news! If the corrupt and cruel Beltway elite want a revolution on their hands, they are going the right way about it! Treat your people like trash for long enough, and you will soon find (in the immortal words of JFK) that those who make peaceful protest impossible will make violent revolution inevitable! Thank God we have never had such problems in our glorious nation!

One prominent military source from a certain well-known paradise of transparency and social accountability (Myanmar, no less!) tells us off the record:

There is no such thing as Trump corruption. This is what you might call… ‘Fake news.’ Nobody had even heard about all this imaginary corruption until the liberal global media elites started talking about it. Doesn’t that make you think there might just be something very shady about it?

Final, a semi-official statement from the Chinese Communist Party notes:

The dishonest, mendacious, manipulative fake news gurus have hurt the feelings of the American people. Fortunately, however, in their puny efforts to smash the regime of President Donald Trump, the corrupt and decadent bourgeois media have shown themselves up as nothing more than eggs smashing against a rock!

Donald Trump has shown great appreciation for these words of comradely solidarity.

Fake news was invented by the Taiwanese!

He deftly flip-flops to us, with a knowing wink.


Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!

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