Categorized | Health, World News

Jeremy Hunt Warns the Public of… “Cough Your Asshole Out Craze!”

Jeremy Hunt Warns the Public of… “Cough Your Asshole Out Craze!”

UK secretary of state for health Jeremy Hunt has warned the public of the latest social media craze…

‘Cough your asshole out!

A charity fundraiser that follows ‘the water bucket challenge,’ #coughyourassholeout’ has gone viral; as You Tube volunteers are intentionally coughing their assholes from out of their bodies.

Hunt said :

I strongly urge the public to avoid this dangerous stunt. Though its intentions are entirely selfless and honourable, there may be serious consequences for those that take part. Involuntary coughing can be a positive reaction from the body that serves to clear the throat and airways. Conversely, a forceful voluntary cough could crack a rib, strain a muscle or rupture a nasal vein.

Richard Pearson, Conservative MP for Carlisle, successfully completed the challenge, raising over four thousand pound for charity. Since then, however, he has openly conceded that his participation in the internet project was a mistake.

Pearson said:

I don’t feel I have received sufficient credit or recognition for my heroic You Tube challenge contribution. My wife was particularly underwhelmed. When I told her I had coughed my precious anal core from out of my anatomy with authenticity, style, grace, precision and nobility, in a gallant, resounding, unbridled manner. When I told her I had unselfishly raised a substantial amount of cash for sufferers of the most severe forms of foot ailments such as bunions, corns, athlete’s foot and ingrowing toe nails, she said:

‘So? I knew a bloke who pissed his balls into a trifle.

EDITOR’S LINKS

More on Jeremy Hunt and the NHS.

SATIRE NEWS:

Britain’s NHS Offers Free Racial Reassignment Surgery to Transracial Community

NHS Euthanasia Policy a Real Killer

North Korea Linked To Upsurge In UK Cycling

NHS Mobile Heart Surgery Scheme Wins Kudos

REALITY NEWS:

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/nhs-staff-rights_uk_5aaf7127e4b05b2218004e24

https://inews.co.uk/news/health/stephen-hawking-tribute-jeremy-hunt-hero/

 

 

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This post was written by

- who has written 24 posts on GlossyNews.com.

Stephen Philip Druce is a spoof/satire article writer from Shrewsbury in the UK. He has previous publications with The Lemon Press, News Mutiny, The Daily Squib, The Inconsequential, Web-E-Books (USA), The Druids Loom and Bad Scents Of Humour. For updates on Stephen’s humour articles, follow him on Twitter - @DruceStephen.

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