Negative Thoughts & Feelings: Win The Game, Reframe!

Last time, I spoke a little about how choosing alternative categories and concepts will help you understand yourself and your place in this world better; by avoiding one-sided, prejudiced and unhealthy views.

Don’t sell yourself short!

Don’t demand ‘the right to an opinion’ about how unworthy you are.

Opinions mean less than nothing; for only the truth should EVER be enough for you.

Here are some tasters for a few more alternative perspectives.

Sadly, I am NOT going to provide any suggestions today.

I don’t even suggest there has to be a single, definitive answer for each one.

However, please treat each one as a jumping-off point, and carefully, gently, non-judgmentally weigh each one.

I promise to provide you with some suggestions later on.

My career is stagnating.

Anyone who reaches this point in life and hasn’t even married and started a family is a complete failure.

I have no idea how to talk to women (or men).

I am of absolutely no value whatsoever, because I have nothing to offer a woman (or a man).

I just seem to be drifting through life, with no direction.

I’ve finished my degree, but I still haven’t found any way forward yet. How much longer do I have to wait to finally take charge of my life?

I can’t compete against other men (or women). Nobody will ever notice me. ESPECIALLY not her (/him).

I don’t seem to do anything but work. The human element in life is lost. Maybe nobody will go near me now.

I have been ill for so long, and now I’m finally recovering, nobody will ever be able to get past the illness to the real me, no matter how well I recover, and no matter what progress I make, in every conceivable way.

He/she is too reticent and can’t seem to make his/her mind up. I’m obviously imagining things.

This person is obviously too smart for me. I have never been to university.

My values are far too old-school/modern/mainstream/innovative for anyone in this country, here and now.

My interests are too niche or wacky to interest anyone else.

I am way too intellectual and bookish for him/her to ever really respect me.

I come across as very full-on, politically. He/she is obviously going to feel overwhelmed. We simply mustn’t get too close, ever! There’s just no point at all even trying.

I have failed in every single relationship attempt I’ve ever had…

He/she is definitely going to judge me for my past sexual history. I just can’t bear that. Especially not from her/him.

Once he finds out I had an abortion in the past, he will definitely not like me any more.

If she/he knew more about what makes me tick, what drives me, my hopes and fears, the values I hold dearest, I know for sure she/he will lose interest in me completely.

We are both acting whimsically. I really can’t be bothered with these games at all. I need certainty, not indecisiveness; and so does he/she.

I have SOME strengths, but they are more than compensated for by my shyness/irritability/closedness/anxiety/depression/insecurity/lack of confidence.

I really like this guy/girl, but I am too afraid of being hurt again to say anything.

I am too afraid of hurting people a second time. I would never wish that on her/him in a million years. I would rather DIE than have that on my conscience!

You can all a few of these privately, in the privacy of your own heart. But you can also post suggestions below.

Try it!

Be fair!

Be nice.

It really isn’t all that serious.

Originally published:

https://medium.com/the-broken-cross-orthodoxy-for-a-wounded-world/more-on-reframing-what-are-your-better-angels-telling-you-about-your-future-4b6a817a125d

Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!

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