Fox Analyst Reverses Opinion About Recession After Losing Job

NEW YORK, NY (GlossyNews) — A former Fox News economic analyst, who only last year said the worst part of the recession was over, is coming under fire from liberals for now claiming the economy is worse than ever. When asked what exactly led to his change in opinion, Christopher Jackson said, “I lost my fucking job!”

The story begins in June 2009, when Jackson told the Washington Post that he believed the economy was in the midst of an upswing and would soon be thriving. In the article, Jackson attributed the strengthening stock market and increases in consumer spending as evidence. “The economy is alive and well, and it actually appears Obama’s recovery package might have done the trick,” he had said.

“Okay, so I was laying it on a bit thick back then,” Jackson now concedes.

“From where I was sitting at the time, all the data showed the economy was in better shape. But from where I am sitting now, I can tell you that’s utter bullshit,” he added while waiting in line at the unemployment office.

Shortly after the article was published, Jackson was let go from his consultant position at the conservative “news” organization. Many in the media saw his firing as political retribution.

“They said he was being fired because of poor job performance, but everyone knows it was really because he was giving some credit to Obama,” White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs said. “At Fox News, giving any kind of credit to the president is like aborting Christ on Christmas.”

Fox News issued the following formal statement on the controversy when Jackson’s employment was terminated: “Since Mr. Jackson claims the current economic climate is looking sunny, we here at Fox have decided to let him go so he can be free to explore the wonderful landscape known as unemployment. We wish him all the best and look forward to seeing how he fairs in this ‘improving’ economy.”

One high-ranking executive at Fox, who spoke on the condition of anonymity, was less vague about the network’s motives. She said, “Of course it was political. Everyone told Chris to keep his ‘facts’ and ‘statistical evidence’ to himself and stick to the talking points. But he just wouldn’t listen.”

Both sides of the politic spectrum are now using Jackson’s about-face on the issue to paint the opposition in a negative light. Republicans are using Jackson’s new stance on the state of the economy as proof that the Democrats have been too optimistic, while Democrats claim that conservatives are more interested in covering up the truth by punishing dissenters than hearing Obama did something right.

There are others who believe that this whole announcement is nothing more than a Hail Mary by Jackson to get his job back at Fox. Asked about that possibility while filling out an application at Applebees, Jackson said, “I wish my goals were that lofty.”

“It’s pretty obvious to everyone why he changed his opinion: he got a glimpse of what it’s really like out there right now. As much as the Democrats want to portray the stimulus package as a success, most Americans aren’t seeing that success in their wallets,” one economic analyst at MSNBC said. “It’s still pretty shitty out there.”

The analyst asked that his name not be given for fear of “turning into the liberal version of Christopher Jackson.”

Most economists do agree that the road to recovery will be a long one, and that it’s still too early to start lavishing praise or condemnation on the current president. As for Jackson, though, he is now firm on his opinion of Obama.

“I was never an Obama supporter and never will be,” Jackson said. “I don’t believe in his type of change. The only kind of change I believe in is the kind I now beg for on the streets. So, can you spare any?”

Author: stuyv

I am a mystery, wrapped in an enigma, folded into a cunundrum, shrink wrapped in a riddle and laminated in secrecy. Otherwise, I'm just a normal guy who writes in his free time in the hope of one day hitting it big like George Lucas (i.e. creatively stumble upon an iconic story I can milk for all its worth before inevitably losing my mind and talent).

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