Saudi Woman Causes Nation’s First Ever Pile-Up

King Salman: “I told you this would happen”

A Saudi Arabian woman has created history in Riyadh today by causing her kingdom’s first ever peak-hour multi-vehicle accident. Mother of 3 Hamida Ghabbour blamed the accident on 1400 years without practice, and said she can’t wait until alcohol restrictions are lifted, so she can blame the booze instead.

“This is all my fault, ladies. I feel I’ve ruined it for everybody” said a visibly distressed Hamida, who is still on her Learner plates. “It’s only now I realise what this compulsory headdress does to your peripheral vision,” she explained, when describing her black burqa with a modest 1 centimetre eye flap. Rescue workers reported no fatalities, but it is believed Saudi King Salman is seriously considering revoking female driver’s licenses, and was overheard repeating the words “I told you this would happen!” when first informed of the tragedy. More to follow…

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