Tag Archive | "pot"

Cannabis Product Review & Resource Website Makes History with $1 Billion Internet Money Buyout Offer


(San Francisco, CA) WeedGear.com — A recently launched review and community participation website has announced that fictional character Towelie, famous for his role on South Park, has raised enough virtual currency through online pimping services to invest his $1 Billion internet dollars in becoming the web’s next marijuana mogul.

Waiting for his payout at the Department of Internet Money (DIM), along side Star Wars Kid, Grumpy Cat, and Cute Sneezing Panda, Towelie said, “Yeah, with all these big names jumping into the business of weed, I figured I’d better get on board. Those back-alley deals I was doing in the old days just weren’t paying off. Maybe it was because of my crack addiction. I can’t remember.” Read the full story

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Scientists: Potheads Cannot Recognize Connection between Their Stash & Murderous Drug Cartels


Scientists have finally proven that there is a big disconnect in the minds of those heavily into pot.

It has been long suspected that marijuana use has negative effects upon the brains and bodies of partakers, a claim equally long denied by the users.

“It is obvious from our recent studies that pot users cannot distinguish reality from fiction.” put forth William Smartguy, head researcher at the Westmoreland Clinic for Studying Dopes and Dope Fiends. Read the full story

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Dennis Rodman Admits He May Have Tiger Blood Also


Dennis Rodman is in rehab. Big surprise after his latest trip to North Korea. Yeah, he got drunk, big whup. He was probably high as well on some good Korean ganga too. Anything papasan want? Anything? You name it Joe, we get for you.

“Yeah, I want the biggest-ass bottle of sake you got and a bowl-ful of that Korean home grown, thanks kindly, Kim.”

And then this, “You know man, I am like so Charlie Sheen-ing right now. I swear I got tiger blood.”

You want holang-i pi? Joe? Tiger blood. Get Joe some tiger blood.

“No, no man, my blood, it’s like…oh never mind.”

[takes another hit off the makeshift bong made from an old piece of pipe and some rice paper]

“What was I saying? Oh yea, Tiger Woods, no…wait yeah, I wanna go golfing. You got clubs?”

Oh yeah, Joe, we got clubs, and rockets, nuclear ones, better than clubs, clubs are for suckers.

“No, no, man, c’mon, give peace a chance. Golf, I want to go golfing…”

No, Joe, we don’t have golf here, fees to club are too expensive. Damn Americans. Sorry Joe, present company excluded.

“Uh, okay then, I think Imma head back over to the states and soak in a hot tub someplace where they know what the hell golf is or whatevahhhh.”

[Takes one last hit off the bong and finishes up the sake before laying back on the comfy floor mattress and lets out a little roar, more like a yawn, really, and crashes for the night.]

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New Pot Laws May Save/Destroy Education System in America


After seeing how much money Colorado made in just the first week of implementing its law allowing the use of recreational marijuana, New Hampshire is hurrying through legislation of its own with a vote scheduled today.

With a hefty 25% state tax, coupled with the usual 2.9% state sales tax on recreational marijuana, Colorado is finally looking at enough money to re-vamp its entire educational system. Washington state will follow later this year, and now several other states are hurrying through legislation to legalize recreational marijuana to attain the same goal.

The latest to vote on making recreational marijuana legal in their state is New Hampshire. A hastily put-together bill is scheduled to take place today, where it is expected to eke by, but still pass. At that point, New Hampshire will be the third state to make up to an ounce of recreational marijuana legal to possess.

That is, unless the Governor of New Hampshire makes good on her promise. Governor Maggie Hassan has vowed to veto the bill if it passes the Senate and House. New Hampshire may be in for a long legal battle as a goodly portion of the citizens of New Hampshire see a way out of educational poverty for their state. Read the full story

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New Marijuana Laws Spur Highest Home Prices in Years


New numbers have come out in the housing sector, indicating that in the next year, the states of Washington and Colorado will have the highest number of home sales in the country. Some other states are not too far behind. What makes these states so successful? Analysts say it is the passage of laws these past few years making the use of medicinal marijuana finally legal.

In Washington and Colorado, especially, new laws make it legal to possess and use small amounts of recreational marijuana. Read the full story

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Washingtonian Excited for Perils of Living in a Stoner State


Recently two states legalized the recreational use of marijuana: Colorado and my state, Washington. In full disclosure, even though, like Bill Clinton, I have never personally tried pot, I voted for passage of this law.

And I want to apologize for my decision. I had no idea that legalizing weed would unleash a tidal wave of chaos, undermining the social contract of this once great state.

For years, my parents, my minister and my 7th grade science teacher, Mr. Curtis, warned me about the dangers of marijuana. The critically acclaimed 1936 documentary film Reefer Madness proved conclusively that even a single puff of marijuana could lead to a life of heroin addiction, crime and attempting to French kiss nuns during mass. Read the full story

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Posted in Health, SocietyComments (1)

Pot-Seeking Hippie Caravans Headed for Marijuana Meccas


Now that the laws are on the books in both Colorado and Washington state making the recreational use of marijuana legal, boomers all over the United States are hitting the road, plotting plans to get their fair share of the heavenly harvest while doing their best to stay under the radar of the local authorities in surrounding states.

‘Maravans’ as they are called, caravans of cars that are leaving from cities all over the US and headed for the two states that have what they want–marijuana–are becoming a regular sight on the nation’s back roads. Read the full story

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What Potheads, Bikers, and Taylor Swift Have in Common


New figures out indicate that blogs featuring pot, bikers, and Taylor Swift get the most hits and the most forum posts of any other, including porn, according to the Worldwide Association of Gossip Syndicate or WAGS.

While Potheads and Pot took the top spot with close to 14 million forum posts in the past three months, bikers came in a close second with 12.5 million. Read the full story

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Posted in Internets TubesComments (1)

Pot and Bongo Fest Expected to Draw Huge Crowds


The First Annual Pot and Bongo Fest scheduled to be held this year is expected to draw huge crowds from all over the world.

“Since this is the first festival in the country featuring legalized marijuana, we can’t put a figure on attendance, but assume it will become one of the most popular festivals in America’s history,” said Bud Harkins, one of the key organizers of the festival affectionately nicknamed “Pongo.” Read the full story

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From COPS to Pot Farmers: How Reality TV Has Done a 360


Everyone who is a fan of reality television knows that COPS is credited with being the first reality-based show on television. A staple on Saturday nights, COPS ruled the roost in reality television for several decades on Fox before being pushed aside for more elaborate shows on other channels.

So it is more than ironic that the latest offering in reality TV shows would be about an activity that has law enforcement officials feeling helpless to stop—Pot Farming in Northern California. Read the full story

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Marijuana Candles Give New Meaning to the Term Melting Pot


A new product is hitting store shelves in the states where medical marijuana is legal. “Melting Pot” candles. The candles are made from a mixture of beeswax and potent medical marijuana and are the brainchild of Potpend Home Products.

These unique candles have been approved for use by the FDA, DEA, FDIC and NATO. Read the full story

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Senate Considers Replacing Part of Medicare Plan with Medical Marijuana Plan


While the debate in the Senate continues over whether to raise taxes on the rich, cut spending on Social Security and Medicare, or both, in order to deal with the debt ceiling crisis, there is one option on the table that is getting quite a bit of attention from both sides—incorporating a medical marijuana option into Medicare-Part D, the national prescription drug plan. Read the full story

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Almost 20 Tons of Unwanted Drugs Turned in to DEA


For the second year in a row, the DEA has organized a drug take-back initiative event at 6 sites throughout New England to collect unused prescription medications from those residents who no longer want or need them.

Unfortunately, just like last year, the prescription medications showing up at the collection sites are just harmless, out-of-date, non-narcotic formulas, dropped off by concerned senior citizens happy to help their government out. Read the full story

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Patriots for Pot Put Support behind Morgan Freeman for President


A more liberal-leaning sect of the Tea Party known as the Patriots for Pot are putting their money behind actor Morgan Freeman for President even though he’s not running (officially).

Dilbert “Doobie” Warner, President of the Patriots for Pot Party (PPP) located in Denver, Colorado says that the members of his party were faced with choosing a candidate to back from a list of some really heavy hitters, but in the end, Morgan Freeman was their number one choice. Read the full story

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Subsidi-Farm Ramps up Medical Marijuana Production to Fund Libyan War


Cultivation of the US Government’s own strain of cannabis known as mellow-yellow by a government-sanctioned agricultural group known as Subsidi-Farm is being ramped up in order to help raise money for the latest war in Libya. The coffers are running dry when it comes to funding social programs, medical health programs and education, but with this latest source of income, the President hopes to stave off any criticism for borrowing more heavily from the Chinese to maintain our presence in 3 wars. Read the full story

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Posted in Top Stories, War ZoneComments (0)

National Tea Party Unwittingly Aligns Itself with California Pot Growers Association


An unlikely partnership has formed between some very conservative-thinking patriots and a group of stoners who could care less about any politics unless, of course, they involve the legalization of marijuana.

How it happened, no one is really certain, but the ability to undo what has been done may be harder than anyone anticipated due to the fact that there is a rather large sum of money hanging in the balance. Read the full story

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