Ode to the Wide Stance Republicans  (Your Love is Wide)

My stance is wide

My love is deep

True Christian men

Don’t judge lost sheep!

I was only on my winding way

I pitched my tent in a valley gay

I didn’t mean to cause dismay

My enemies lied upon me, while I lay

They grasped my buckler

They took my shield

While I was dreaming in the field

A wretched Saul I am today

But I swear to you, I am totally NOT gay!

I was only sporting like Potiphar’s wife

Not leading a full-blown sinful life

I was just trying to see who I could be

Not damn my soul for all this whole great long eternity

It was all an idle game, like the play of Brahma

Oh, shit! No heathen! I meant Prophet Rama

Jesus doesn’t judge poor sinners

If it was only a meagre dinner

I didn’t feast like a Babylonian King

No true pious person has kissed my ring

I’m no naive Nimrod, nor tall Goliath

Just a humble servant, who craves his stipend

Please don’t think I look down on you

I prefer to look up, or just behind

Cos I’m a humble kinda guy

I won’t even begrudge you my share of pie!

The world has no love for wide stance guys

Well, they hate God too. So I’m not surprised!

So, please don’t judge this humble slave

Swagger’s pride corrupts…

But kneeling saves!

Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!