Allegedly Girthy Guys Refuse Fact-Check, Obviously (comic)

The overwhelming majority of us guys know that we’re between 6-10 inches in length, and we all swear it has nothing to do with the fact that women wouldn’t recognize a foot if it was stuffed into their own shoes.

This cartoon takes it a step further. What if your hot, beloved girlfriend or wife was a researcher looking to quantify the exactitudes of penis dimensions and performance… yeah, you’d opt out. Sorry honey, it’s for the preservation of our manhood. Read more Allegedly Girthy Guys Refuse Fact-Check, Obviously (comic)

Share

Immigrants: Stop Stealing out Lowly Paid, Terrible Jobs No One Wants (comic)

We hear too often about immigrants “stealing our jobs,” but without enough context. Back east there are states that have passed strict anti-immigrant laws, and the tomatoes have rotted in the field with no one to pick them.

So maybe there’s a middle ground to be found on such matters… well, as a north-western satirist, it’s beyond my pay grade to say what’s right or wrong in the sickly, disgusting and detestable deep south. But I can say what they’re doing now doesn’t work. Read more Immigrants: Stop Stealing out Lowly Paid, Terrible Jobs No One Wants (comic)

Share

Men Admit the Number One Thing They Love in Women (comic)

We’ve all been there, maybe not quite this explicitly, but the sentiments still remain. The vast majority of men love women, all women, in ways they can’t describe… at least, not out loud.

Guys, we can pretend to be gentlemen all we want, but when the rubber meets the road, or whatever place it is that one’s rubber might meet, you have to learn that sometimes it’s okay to shut your damn pie hole. Read more Men Admit the Number One Thing They Love in Women (comic)

Share

Artist Refuses to Admit Art is Terrible (comic)

Okay, you guys have given me enough grief. No, these creatures don’t look like cats, but come on, I have no background in art. I’m the humor guy… oh, I’m not funny either? Well bummer for me.

Even the cats themselves can admit when they’re not as pretty as they should be. Take some comfort in that, because it’s a tacit de-facto admission of my lack of skillz. You win, interwebz. You win. Read more Artist Refuses to Admit Art is Terrible (comic)

Share

Dog Escapes Yard, Discovers Nothing (comic)

Dogs seem so happy in the yard. All those chew toys and balls to play with, but it doesn’t stop them from burrowing under fences in search of greener, or in this case, identical pastures.

I’m not saying dogs are dumb. I’m saying they’re adorable. They’re like children who never learn to talk and die in their teens. Pretty much ideal, really. Read more Dog Escapes Yard, Discovers Nothing (comic)

Share

I Judge You By Your Ignorant Font Choice (comic)

More than a decade ago, I saw a stupid sign with a stupid, stupid font. I judged them, pointed it out to my friend, and we shared a laugh… then this week I saw it again. Same stupid 90s font, same exact scenario.

Come on, amateur car dealers, we judge you for your terrible choices in fonts. This is Seattle, we’re a tech city, if there’s one thing we learned just after figuring out what a computer is, it was what makes for a good font choice. Read more I Judge You By Your Ignorant Font Choice (comic)

Share