Outbreak of Killer Clown Fights in Belfast

The killer crown craze has finally hit Northern Ireland!

Bigtime Bozo Theresa ‘Trident Tumblebuffin May’ found the Tory Clown Car a little empty, and she needed to squeeze a few more crazy buffoons into her wacko little circus ring in London!

The Monster Raving Loony Party weren’t interested.

She must be crazy!

They guffawed.

Poor Tess.

Still, this sad-faced street mime who has been largely silent in the face of ever-growing mockery and ridicule of her political buffonery, has still managed to custard-pie the British people, by inviting a gaggle of badly-trained monkeys, rabid rottweilers, hilariously grumpy and crusty old dinosaurs, and even the occasional scared rabbit (?!) to join her spectacular menagerie of un-self-ironically-comedic clowns and half-domesticated hyper-political animals.

This, however, has led to a turf was in Belfast.

Trident Tess’s new clown recruits aren’t just any oul’ insane jokers now there, so it is!

It turns out the crazy, bumbling ringmistress has ended up inviting a gang of KILLER CLOWNS in error!

Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Now isn’t that there funny, now!

The Tories/DUP clown car includes violent loyalists with a history of clumsy terrorist stunts, crazy Calvinist comedians who like jesting about bombing villages and other hilarious practical jokes to get the Papishes running for the hills, and even the odd chemically insane nutter who thinks the earth is 6000 years old, and Noah and the lads used to have a wee (obviously non-Gaelic!) kickabout with the Raptors! Sure all that there’s tara now, so it is!

Editor’s Pick:

Repentant Paisley’s Heterophobic Hate Campaign

Dissident “MRA” Terrorists Wreak Havoc in Northern Ireland


Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!