Categorized | War Zone, World News

MRA Becomes Militant Dawah Activist

MRA Becomes Militant Dawah Activist

This is a new, previously unseen story, which I am publishing here in order to celebrate the release of The Great Flâneur Massacre. The latter satirical novella is being re-released on Amazon as part of The Great Flaneur Narrative on May 31!

***

Rob Schiller, the whingeing tenure-cadging graduate of Wallace Runnymede’s The Great Flaneur Narrative, has started to intellectualize in a rather disturbing manner.

Indeed. Disappointed at the fact that no-one has given him a post at a university, this achingly under-appreciated lad with a crushing sense of entitlement has combined his hipster ethos with a sprinkling of jihadist rhetoric.

Schiller was already hostile to feminism, which latter he has always regarded as a maliciously counterfeit social justice movement designed purely to rob hard-working young white straight males of their rightful vocational entitlements.

So, the step to becoming a misogynist jihadist wasn’t too difficult for him to make.But what does the UK’s latest hipster jihadist actually think about the world he lives in?

Schiller wails:

Islam was so very, very wonderful better in the old days before it went electric. Technology is merely a tool of Satan & corrupt & decadent music bosses, and that makes me so, so sad! ;(

I am just SICK of people only listening to the parts of the Quran that talk about peace & love. There’s much better stuff out there…

Still, it’s too much to expect the likes of you probably wouldn’t understand that! You people really hurt my feelings so, so much! ;(

I remember when Islam was really EDGYYY, but after the first few Caliphs they sold out! I am just so oppressed… ;(

I knew the Prophet’s teachings before they went MAINSTREEEAAAM! But nowadays, I am just REALLY, REALLY TIRED of all these Hanafis, Malikis & Shias jumping on the bandwagon! It just makes me want to cry ;(

However, after being waterboarded, getting a few good hard knocks on the good old Salafi-salami, and finally getting let out with a fashionable magnetic wristband, on condition of good behaviour, Rob has finally changed his tune.

 You know, I really used to love making hipster jokes before it went MAAAIIINSTREEEAAAM. But now everyone’s doing it, I don’t feel the same overweening pride in my edgy wit! ;((((((

Even so, Rob is now just as much a pariah as he ever was. From former MRA moderate male misogynist to former moderate political Islamist jihadist… now isn’t he a charming lad!

Still, having said that, he isn’t a REAAALLY, REAAALLY NICE GUY! But then, in fairness, most MRAs & jihadists aren’t.

That’s probably why, by now, most Muslims and most men just won’t have anything to do with him.

Nor indeed will pretty much anyone, really!

Well, perhaps there’s a lesson in there somewhere…

***

Watch out for an update tomorrow on The Great Flaneur Narrative! 

***

Article abridged from a piece on Satire Catastrophes.

Share

This post was written by

- who has written 345 posts on GlossyNews.com.

Currently co-editing Glossy News (under the webmaster, Brian K. White). Contact me to pitch or submit your satire! wallacerunnymede@gmail.com w_runnymede (Twitter) See my Facebook page as well: https://www.facebook.com/Wallace-Runnymede-125963814655515/ And my book serials: http://glossynews.com/author/wallacebooks/ You can by my ebooks from many stores, including Amazon. https://www.facebook.com/Wallace-Runnymede-125963814655515/

.

Leave a Reply


We are also looking for a satire editor
and a Clever Photoshop Guru...
Glossy News Exclusive Exposés


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Podcast


(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)


More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

DHgate.com



All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial