Blair: My Critics on Iraq Should Check Their Privilege (2/2)

The problem isn’t so much about not listening to voters.

No, the problem is when the views of mere fallible, imperfect, and often downright ignorant and uneducated voters of mere mortal flesh and blood are…

I mean, the problem is when the mundanely average common man’s prejudices are somehow, you know, treated as some kind of abstract, default, standard, disreputably vanillaesque norm…

Yes, the problem is the tyranny of all these merely opportunistic and ignorant assumptions which are, as it were, you see, for some mysteriously undisclosed reason or another, to be somehow considered as ‘common sense.’


Nope! Me neither.

The problem with arbitrarily privileging the views of voters is that it excludes and marginalises the equally valid and equally valuable (if not more so!) views of people in power.

But then, as always, the problem with those who abuse their power over others is that their unwarranted and undeserved privilege is often deeply insidious and subtle.

There should be less talk about the disempowerment and disenfranchisement of elected officials, however pressing and urgent this crucial issue may be!…

And more talk about the unearned advantage, the illicit privilege which EVERY SINGLE ONE of these domineering voters in this country of mine consider themselves worthy to inexcusably hold over me, and to unjustly and maliciously wield against an innocent and disenfranchised subaltern figure like me!

No, no! Now, don’t you EVER say you’re ‘not privileged!’

Yes, yes, I know, I know! Everybody has it hard; some more than others, let’s be honest about this! Hint hint.

But then, that’s PRECISELY how privilege works, isn’t it!

No! Don’t you ever DARE say you aren’t privileged, MERELY because you had some uncle from Baghdad, or someone of that ilk, you know, who has ended up killed in some kind of, you know, unfortunate and entirely unanticipated military accident…

Or MERELY because your mother, or, never mind, or some kind of relative or other, as it were, or something like that, was serving in the British Armed Forces and had, you know, the admittedly rather rotten luck (from a particular point of view, I suppose!) of somehow ending up getting tortured and killed for some largely inexplicable reason or another.

No, no, NO! Absolutely NO-ONE pulls themselves up by their own bootstraps!

So, such being the case, if it really is so terribly, terribly hard for you, how hard must it REALLY be for me and other underprivileged and oppressed individuals…

Yes, we whose perfectly reasonable and dynamic views are malignantly sneered at, sweepingly dismissed, and utterly marginalised and excluded from so-called ‘civilised discussion?!’

Well, let me tell you this! You have a polling card. This serves you as a kind of universal passport of privilege, to get you all kinds of unearned advantages which, let’s be honest, I myself could probably put to much better use myself.

As could many others!

Oh wait, well, maybe not…!

Still, let’s cut to the chase. You know, I simply wouldn’t expect hidebound, ignorant ideologues like you people to ever understand that. I mean, HOW COULD YOU! How could you POSSIBLY have known all that, unless I had been so extravagantly generous with my time as to patiently strive to educate you about the error of your ways!

Professor Smiggles has since noted that Blair’s rant on ‘voter’s privilege’ entirely misses the point of privilege critique:


But then, what would he know? He’s only a voter.

Blair responds:

Hmmm… those comments. Well, that was no John Chilcot Inquiry, believe you me!

Yes, yes! Another tedious, predictable barrage of rigid, inflexible, hidebound, cynical, opportunistic, and as always, purely politically motivated smears; from yet another mere UNELECTED, UNACCOUNTABLE citizen of vote-casting age! (Sorry, Nigel!) #BlairRegrets

Well, you know what? It’s even worse than we all thought. Who on earth is this Professor Smiggles, anyway?

I mean, let’s face it, if people like that think they can get away with whatever they want, just because they can, I’m beginning to think our democracy is in an even worse state of peril than we all already thought it was.

Well, you know what? I think it’s about time we had more checks and balances!


Just this once, I’m with you on that one, Tony! Like almost everyone in the UK, I would like to see more accountability, and more legal penalties for those who don’t sufficiently take into consideration how their actions will distress and disenfranchise others.

So, maybe you do have one thing in common with British voters, after all!


Author: Wallace Runnymede

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