Hacker McKinnon Facing Extradition to Jabba the Hutt’s Planet

British computer hacker Gary McKinnon, whose extradition to the US was blocked on humanitarian grounds by UK Home Secretary Theresa May today, now faces a prospect nearly as terrifying: being sent for punishment on the alien planet of Tatooine.

McKinnon has long claimed that his hacking was aimed at discovering the truth about UFOs. It seems that he has now incurred the wrath of the Tatooine premier, Jabba the Hutt, by probing into the question of alien life a little too closely.

Ms May acknowledged that she will not be seeking to block McKinnon’s extradition to Tattooine, despite overturning the earlier decision to send him for trial in the US.

She explained, “I felt that, while conditions in Mr Hutt’s Tatooine lair are somewhat primitive, the prospect [of extradition to the US] was far, far worse.

McKinnon’s human rights would have certainly been in jeopardy had he been thrown into the notorious US legal system. Being manacled to a hideous, slug-like alien is clearly preferable”.

McKinnon, speaking through his lawyer Ms L Organa, agreed. “My client narrowly avoided the terrible fate of being sent for trial in the US”, she said. “Compared with doing time in an American prison, being slowly digested in the belly of the Saarlac over a thousand years will be a walk in the park.”

Author: noseybonk

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