Kim Jong Il Crush on Bill Richardson Intensifies after Latest Visit

Kim Jong Il is said to still be talking about the wonderful visit he had with his “American GI buddy” earlier this month.

Those who know Kim Jong Il intimately claim that it was no coincidence that Richardson was chosen to travel to North Korea to discuss various issues concerning nuclear power and tension with South Korea. They say Kim has a huge “man crush” on New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson.

While Richardson claims he was officially invited to North Korea by the chief nuclear control negotiator, Kim Kye Gwan, most everyone agrees that was just a ruse to get Richardson back in N. Korea so that he and Kim Jong Il could have some alone time.

“Ooh, I no homo but that Bill Richardson make my kimchi smokin’ hot. He real man’s man.”

This statement has been heard over and over again by those closest to Kim Jong Il, especially once he’s had a few Coronas under his belt. They claim Kim loves everything Mexican, and that includes the beer.

A Richardson spokesperson vehemently denied the claims that Richardson and Kim Jong Il were “intimate” friends but did confirm that, no sooner had the governor’s flight landed back in New Mexico, he received a vague text message from Kim wondering when they could schedule another “one-on-one”, followed by a much less vague message of “don’t the ask, don’t the tell–wink wink.”

Richardson claims that this is just Kim’s way of making a joke but admitted that it creeped him out just a bit. He said that from now on he would wait to speak to the President before taking it upon himself to make any more unofficial visits to North Korea.

Author: P. Beckert

P. Beckert's is one voice vying for frequency room at the top of the opinion dial. Angered and bewildered by many of today’s events, P. Beckert uses humor as a tool to fight against an onslaught of stupidity and ignorance that seems to permeate the airwaves and pollute the sensitivities of a once brilliant nation. You can find more at