Categorized | Politics

Cindy McCain’s Chic Haircut Causes Senate Upheaval

Cindy McCain’s Chic Haircut Causes Senate Upheaval

PRESCOTT, AZ — Re-elected Sen. John McCain, going on 74, seemed to coast to victory in November, easily beating Tuscon Democrat Rodney Glassman to hang onto his Arizona Senate seat. But his wife’s new chic haircut got major press, and this threw the 5-term senator into a major funk.

“I am older than dirt, I have more scars than Frankenstein and I won by a fucking 25% margin, yet my wife’s haircut gets more press than I can afford to buy!” reasoned the senator.

She is garnering all sorts of attention for her chic new cut. A more modern cut than she was sporting two years ago during the Presidential race.

“Christ almighty! I am supposed to be the family bread-winner here and one fucking hair cut gets ahead of my press.”

Cindy McCain is back in the spotlight. And daddy is not happy!

Still signature blonde, Cindy’s hair is now short and choppy with layers of locks framing her face. She has also added lowlights and highlights which give dimension and depth.

“How am I supposed to be able to counter a $250 million heiress in the press?” He asked. “I lose. That’s how. And she is my fucking wife on top of it all.”

Then as he walked away from the microphone, the senator said, “Well, there are 99 senators and one president who aren’t going to like me for a long time after this. I am going to make the Senate of the United States the fall guy for this. Just wait and see. Gone are immigration reform, tax reform, DADT, you name it, It’s gone.

F’ing C.”


This post was written by

- who has written 110 posts on

Gender: Male Astrological Sign: Scorpio Zodiac Year: Horse Occupation: Graphic Design Location: Chicago : IL : United States Wine and graphic design… inseparable. Interests Barflies & Lemonade Favorite Movies Anything with Paul Newman; sauce, lemonade, sex; not in that order. Favorite Music Classical Second Favorite Jazz Favorite Books Underworld–Don DeLillo Favorite Movies "I ain't got no favorite movies, well maybe just that Bambi"


Leave a Reply

We are also looking for a satire editor
and a Clever Photoshop Guru...
We Made a Movie!

Check us out on Kickstarter!

Glossy News Exclusive Exposés

-- (SEE ALL Videos) --

Glossy News Fake Commercials!

More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial