The more I come to understand autistics, on a very individual level, the more I am convinced of an old suspicion.
Nobody on earth NEEDS sex.
But everyone benefits from basic physical intimacy.
If you know someone who is outside of the love and marriage market, whether through poverty, plain looks, shyness, illness, or disability, don’t forget to hug them next time you see them.
Clasp their shoulder.
Shake hands with them.
Caress their scalp gently, if it’s appropriate to do so.
Kiss them on both cheeks, if they will not be offended or disconcerted.
What everyone in this world needs is not sex, but a little bit of love, a little bit of low-level physical intimacy.
Don’t be afraid of a society where people are afraid to care, and being vulnerable and intimate is a sign of weakness.
Take the risk of love.
Be aware of appropriate personal boundaries, yes; these can vary from person to person, and people themselves can change over time.
But in doing so, always be on the lookout to affirm and recognise those who need that reassurance.
A simple touch means this:
I accept you.
I honour you.
No matter you’ve done or haven’t done, you are loved.
The biggest problem is not people being unable to find a wife or husband…
It’s the lack of basic physical intimacy that is the hardest thing of all.
Together, everyone can change that.