Trump Being A President Is As Battery Acid Is To Being A Skin Conditioner.

Here, I’ll help you out with the first few. Read ‘Trump is to being President as…’ and then finish the sentence with any of the phrases that are listed below. Don’t worry, it’s easy!

Trump is to being President as:

french fries are to being a gourmet meal.

the Edsel is to being a Grand Prix winner.

boxing is to being a Sunday church event.

syphilis is to being a factor in a date’s attractiveness.

(OK, you should have the gist of it now. You are on your own from here on).

leprosy is to improving your social life.

a Marine haircut on a super model.

drug addiction is to helping you reach your goal of sainthood.

falling down a flight of stairs is to helping your dancing career.

castor oil for making a dressing for the salad bar.

a unicycle in the Tour de France.

poison ivy for a floral display.

a lead fuselage for a helicopter.

Dick Cheney to being made head of Amnesty International.

a porcupine in an airbag factory.

a bikini on a walrus.

a fish is to winning a running marathon.

a landmine to a rugby game.

an elephant to a china shop (yes, there is a double meaning here).

poison oak to a nudist colony.

(Hang in there. It is almost done!)

having a rectum to a paramecium.

a condom collection to the Franciscans.

a pea shooter at a NRA convention.

a warthog is to a cosmetic line.

Author: rfreed

I was born and I died. Being a disembodied entity makes it very cheap for me to get by. Not having to worry about eating or having a place to live gives me a lot of freedom to squander my time writing occasionally funny articles. See more almost funny stuff at


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