In fairness, the Green Party have a lot going for them.
Well, for a start, technically, they’re not exactly the BNP/SWP, are they?
(Insofar as there’s a difference!)
And again, nor do they have any links to the National Front…
I mean, they’re just a whole different frickin’ brand of Young Earth Jehovahtology.
But their policies, so far, haven’t been all that.
Let’s put our Cosmic Tinfoil Toupees on, and speculate on what our self-styled Platonic Guardians of the ecosystem (not to be confused with Unreconstructed-Neo-Yada-Yada economic terrorists and pillagers of nature!) might just be keeping under their Home-Brew-Humping-Hipster-Hats.
ENTIRELY DEMOCRATIC, BOTTOM-UP AND ACCOUNTABLE GLOBAL INSTITUTIONAL NETWORK FOR ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION, SALVATION AND DELIVERANCE
Aye, that’ll definitely work.
International Criminal Court, anyone?
Oh, wait. Hang on… let’s not be too dismissive or
undialectical, um, one-sided here. Pope Francis might just be able to deliver us from all evil. 😉
Psst… don’t worry. I swear, this guy isn’t a ‘moderate Political Islamist,’ ‘moderate Khmer Rouge apologist,’ or even ‘moderate neocon!’…
I mean, he’s more like a ‘moderate Jesuit,’ if that makes you feel any better 😛
REPLACE CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY WITH CRIMES AGAINST NATURE
What is killing a mere socially constructed and historically contingent species compared with killing the entire Cosmos?
CRIMINALIZE HATE SPEECH AGAINST NON-HUMANS
Privileging mere ‘integral synthetic components of the homo sapiens species’ must stop. By applying hate crime legislation to animals, vegetables and minerals of every kind, politicians can show they genuinely care, and aren’t tokenistic about being tough on the causes of crime…
I.e. the wrong kind of humans.
Yeah, y’know, the anthropocentric type.
COMPASSIONATELY RE-EDUCATE ANTHROPOCENTRISTS
The Green Party don’t hate anyone. How could they? All they want to do is save you from the error of their ways. Rather than indoctrinate you, they just want to realise what is already in your Heart of Hearts. And what sacrifice could be too much for such an inestimable boon?
Psst. Don’t forget that, in the vast, booming, buzzing confusion of this Kosmos, no-one has ever got away with running and hiding from their true self. Look inside, and you will see the truth. You don’t need any Gulag to convince you. After all, mainstream bourgeois ‘science’ must one day fall and tremble at the blessed feet of your truest Soul of Souls.
IMPROVE SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH, METHODOLOGY AND EPISTEMOLOGY
For far too long, Arrogant Positivists and Unreconstructed Modernists have been craven apologists for the tyranny of so-called ‘facts’ over actual science. But there are no facts, only interpretations. Even Nietzsche said that, and he was practically a Neoliberal in all but name.
Well, just like pretty much any other eminently problematisable Kindness-Criminal and Virtue-Offender in history.