Lhasa, Tibet – Glossy News – The Dalai Lama has spoken up and taken credit for the recent earthquake that hit China. Citing recent ‘bad karma’ over the suppression of Tibet’s population, the Dalai Lama said he would pray for the victims, but hates the Chinese leadership for years of brutal suppression. He took credit and responsibility for the ‘Great Jump’ that sparked the earthquake.
“We, as a free and indigenous people, all jumped up and landed at the exact same moment causing the Earth to tremble!” Claims Lhasa Apso, the Tibetan Minister of Great Movement. He described the coordinated ‘Great Jump’ event to a bevy of foreign reporters in this tiny nation’s capitol. Witnesses confirmed the statement saying it was performed by fully 100% of the entire Tibetan population and in total unison.
The resulting shock wave caused a 7.9 earthquake that rattled windows as far away as Mongolia and caused vibrations in Beijing, China’s capitol.
Since the ‘Great Jump’ has met with such successful results, the Dalai Lama has promised further acts disobedience by announcing plans of a ‘Great Pee’ in the later part of 2011.