Categorized | Talky Pictures, War Zone

Kim Jong-un Rejects Peace Offering! Guarantees Death to Rogen, Franco, America

Kim Jong-un Rejects Peace Offering! Guarantees Death to Rogen, Franco, America

Pyongyang, North Korea – Co-stars for the upcoming film, The Interview, James Franco and Seth Rogen find themselves boiling in a scalding cauldron of steamy garlic butter this week after their recent peace offering to North Korean Leader, Kim Jong-un, failed to compensate for the unfavorable plot in the film.

“Whenever you make a movie about killing a highly revered leader of another country, especially one that follows a Communist regime, there is going to be breadlash,” said International Film Analyst, Henry Sourdough.

“In my opinion, Seth Rogen and James Franco have entered a fiery, brick oven and will be baked in about nine seconds,” added Sourdough, while working on the obituaries for the future deceased actors.

The peace offering, which was intended to be cloned breadsticks from the extinct restaurant chain, the Olive Garden, have not lived up to the standards Kim Jong-un was accustomed to when he last visited the United States in 2010.

“Our entire organization was disappointed by Mr. Jong-un’s negative reaction to the replicated breadsticks,” said Quality Assurance Director, Jim Butterie of the National Breadstick Association (N.B.A.). Butterie was the leading engineer behind the 32 million dollar initiative to clone the breadsticks as part of the peace offering from Rogen and Franco. “I feel that Americans will be disappointed to lose these great actors, but will be proud that they supported Olive Garden’s breadsticks with such admiration,” Butterie added.

Columbia Pictures still plans on releasing the film on October 10th in the United States, despite the failed peace offering and countless threats from North Korea. A tribute film entitled Breadless, is in production and honors the future deceased stars, Seth Rogen and James Franco. The film is expected to be released by Thanksgiving.

Share

This post was written by

- who has written 34 posts on GlossyNews.com.

In the history of mannkind, there have only been a handful of individuals with the talent to take genuine news and completely warp it into something that will convince an audience to believe the unbelievable. FreeMann is one of those select few. A proud contributor of GlossyNews.com, he has been writing comedy, satire and parody for more than 10 years and is credited with writing the screenplays "Bar Critics," "Breadsterastyx," "Breadsterafish" and "Breadsterastorm." For all of his GlossyNews.com articles and additional work, please visit It's a Cat, Just So You Know, Entertainment at www.itsacatjustsoyouknow.com

.

2 Responses to “Kim Jong-un Rejects Peace Offering! Guarantees Death to Rogen, Franco, America”

  1. Antonio Breaderas says:

    I just wanted to inform everyone that I have accepted one of the acting roles in “Breadless” and filming is going great!

  2. Matthew Breadrick says:

    Coming soon to a Broadway stage near you: “The Fabulous Baker Boys”. Free breadsticks to the first 500 audience members.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks


Leave a Reply


We are also looking for a satire editor
and a Clever Photoshop Guru...
Glossy News Fake Commercials!


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Visit the “Old Version” of our Site

     
Still want more? Find thousands of buried satirical gems in our archives on the old version of Glossy News!

Check This Out!

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

16 posts
11 posts
10 posts
5 posts
2 posts
1 post


All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial