Kim Jong-un Rejects Peace Offering: Guarantees Death to Rogen, Franco, America

Pyongyang, North Korea – Co-stars for the upcoming film, The Interview, James Franco and Seth Rogen find themselves boiling in a scalding cauldron of steamy garlic butter this week after their recent peace offering to North Korean Leader, Kim Jong-un, failed to compensate for the unfavorable plot in the film.

“Whenever you make a movie about killing a highly revered leader of another country, especially one that follows a Communist regime, there is going to be breadlash,” said International Film Analyst, Henry Sourdough.

“In my opinion, Seth Rogen and James Franco have entered a fiery, brick oven and will be baked in about nine seconds,” added Sourdough, while working on the obituaries for the future deceased actors.

The peace offering, which was intended to be cloned breadsticks from the extinct restaurant chain, the Olive Garden, have not lived up to the standards Kim Jong-un was accustomed to when he last visited the United States in 2010.

“Our entire organization was disappointed by Mr. Jong-un’s negative reaction to the replicated breadsticks,” said Quality Assurance Director, Jim Butterie of the National Breadstick Association (N.B.A.). Butterie was the leading engineer behind the 32 million dollar initiative to clone the breadsticks as part of the peace offering from Rogen and Franco. “I feel that Americans will be disappointed to lose these great actors, but will be proud that they supported Olive Garden’s breadsticks with such admiration,” Butterie added.

Columbia Pictures still plans on releasing the film on October 10th in the United States, despite the failed peace offering and countless threats from North Korea. A tribute film entitled Breadless, is in production and honors the future deceased stars, Seth Rogen and James Franco. The film is expected to be released by Thanksgiving.