Deluded May Goes Full Donald Trump on ‘Tremendous Brexit Deal!’

Confused controversialist and widely despised half-arsed “Brexit bod” (officially!) Theresa May has recently unleashed an utterly deluded rant about her ridiculous ‘deal’ with the EU…

A simply spiffing world-ending negotiating triumph that is universally panned by Leave and Remain, Tories and Labour, and even her very own innumerable zero-point-zeros of the past few years…

If there is even any point at all taking a long-term view of history in the exciting highminded, footloose and fancy free continent du jour!

This stunningly self-deluded gaslighting orgy proceedeth thusly:

I… am going… to make a deal.
I… am going… to make a deal. I made a deal! This is absolutely the greatest deal in the history of the world! Tremendous deal! Can you believe it. Can you believe it, ladies and gentlemen.
NOOOObody… not ONE person, in the dishonest fake news media… has said a single word about our deal. Our incredible deal! Just incredible! It’s tremendous.
I’m a great dealmaker. I know the best deals. The Theresa knows the best words. Words for deals. Deals make words. Words make deals.
So we went to Brussels. We made a tremendous deal, the British people are happy, the Brussels people are happy, the French, the Germans, the Albanians, everybody just loved the deal! Tremendous! You can trust me on that one!
All these people, China, Korea, Mexico, you know! Bad deals. Unbeliiiiievably BAD DEALS! You have just no idea. Can you believe it, ladies and gentlemen. Can you believe it. People are saying stuff! Did you hear about their ridiculous deals. Unbelievable, ladies and gentlemen. Unbelievable. Britain needs a GREAT DEALMAKER, with a great SKILLZ WITH WORDS!!!!!!!

Diane Abott, David Lammy and Tim Farron commented:

Well, what can I say! This shit pretty much won us over. This utterly unhinged, wide-eyed narcissistic Brexit rant makes US look sane, intelligent and balanced. Gotta give awwah bitch credit for that one! LULZ!

Guy Verhofstadt would have replied, but now that he’s finally upgraded from 90% late stage syphilis brain rot to about 98/99%, we’d better let him be for now.
God loves a trier!
… But then again, so do creepy Euronationalist imperialists…

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Author: Wallace Runnymede

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