Tag Archive | "war on terror"

Gitmo Vs Justice


This is my response to the following article about 5 alleged 9/11 masterminds, who have been held at Gitmo since 2002 still in pre-trial hearings:
https://www.hrw.org/news/2016/07/26/dispatches-guantanamo-9/11-case-staggers

No doubt due in large part to lack of mainstream media attention of ongoing Guantanamo proceedings, many Americans today believe the perpetrators of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attack all perished on that day. People are unaware of the fact that the US government has detained five men with alleged connection, at least one of whom is deemed to be a “mastermind.”

Read the full story

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Frank Turner Song Parody: Tony F***ed the Country!


Whatever happened to Britain?
It’s like we’re scared of phantom enemies to the point of bedpissin’
Even if the danger is minor
The press and gov scaremonger
With their endless agitprop bullshit!

Yo, bigot! Anyone who looks less white than you
Makes you wonder if they’re immigrants or Muslims or Jews
But I’m tired of the endless hatred
And yet the media hacks are always stirring shit! Read the full story

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9/12/2001 – The Days After The Unthinkable Happened – Part 5


9/12/2001, THE DAYS AFTER THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENED – Part 5 (A serial book excerpt)

Previous installments – After Flight 93 crashes into the White House on 9/11/2001 killing President Bush as was originally planned, Dick Cheney, the Vice President, is taken to a secured location for protection.

From there he oversees the demolition of what remains of the Twin Towers.

Part 5

The first estimates were 5,000 dead at the Twin Towers, 400 at the Pentagon and 34 at the White House. The Twin Towers they might never know the exact number given how many visitors and tourists were there at the fateful moments.

Head companies located therein were already sending the FBI their personnel files of who was working that day. Police phone lines were jammed with worried relatives asking about their kin who worked there.

It was already known that a number of emergency personnel, especially firemen, had been crushed when the towers collapsed. The intentional demolishing of the towers would be kept a top secret.

There would be too much misunderstanding of a necessary action. Large segments of the populace would definitely see it the wrong way.

It could probably not be hidden forever, but hopefully would hold for a while until some order was restored.

The combined effort of the CIA and the FBI were already coming up with a profile of suspects on the fated planes. A disturbingly high number of Saudi Arabian nationals were on all the flights.

That alone was enough of an answer for many. It was probably an Islamic terrorist attack. Suspicions were also thrown in the direction of Saddam Hussein’s corner, but it was doubted that he would do such a low budget form of revenge and with so many planes.

It was not his style. Already conspiracy theorists were having a field day with the aggressors being everything from Irish separatists to the Vatican.

More serious and studied minds put their feelers out towards domestic saboteur possibilities, Libya’s President Gaddafi, the Red Army and Palestinian vengeance. Of those four, only the Palestinian idea held any real likelihood.

But the real, the looming, the almost obvious suspicion was the heart of the Mideast discontentment- Al Queda or any one of the dozens of wanna-be terrorist groups who wished to be taken seriously and vented aggravations both real and imagined against the United States and Western society in general.

The entire scope of the U.S. Intelligence community was working on the solution.

The East wing was made the center of operations for the White House. Little could be salvaged from the Oval Office. What instruments were lost there had been quickly replaced.

The Lincoln Bedroom was now the substitute for the Oval Office. The great Emancipators bed had been pushed to a corner and a rather ordinary oak desk was the subsistence for Bush’s antique one.

Of course there had been a big to-do about this in the newspapers with numerous photos of Cheney taken while working. The photos were always accompanied by another photo of the wreckage of the West Wing for psychological impact.

A large conference table had also been maneuvered into the the room. Today it would be well used for this would be the first Cabinet meeting of President Cheney’s leadership.

Cheney kept the meeting of the first Cabinet meeting to the point. Everyone was on edge anyway because of the bombing and the unexpected changes it brought about. One thing he could count on was they were all instep with him.

They were Bush’s choices. A few of them would be slowly moved out. They had worked well with the hick from Texas, but Cheney was going to have to be Wyoming with them, and a couple would not make that cut.

He wanted a sleek machine. One that didn’t give him “No.” for an answer. One that did as he ordered. That was one thing he picked up from the military that he ruled but did not serve. Giving orders and expecting them obeyed.

“The first order of business will be to put a tab on every damn Muslim in this country. I don’t care if he is a babe just getting delivered, they need to be watched.

“We will keep most of it secret, but I am sure the liberals will come up with some lovey-dovey reason for being touchy feely with them. We cannot put up with that BS. We need to immediately round up anyone who is even a little suspicious. This goes for their teenagers too.

“We don’t want them passing through the sieve only to light a fire under our beds the next morning. We don’t want concentration camps like we did for the Japanese in WWII, but we want as close to that as we can come and get away with it.”

“The eggs who show any real suspicion we will hold in one maximum prison. I am thinking of ADX in Colorado. It will be easy to watch them there. If they escape they’ll stick out like sore thumbs.” He gave his own half-joke a half smile. The crowd laughed nervously at it.

“We will keep the whole affair as secret as we can, which of course is impossible. But right now we have the worlds’ sympathy. The only ones that will strongly object are the other Muslim countries and, of course Russia and maybe the Mainland Chinese just to be pain in the asses.

“Any European country with a sizable Muslim population- Germany, England, France, will be nervous too and back us up. And they are the ones who matter. But we will say we are doing it to protect them from retaliatory violence. We could probably even get away with saying we were doing it to shield them from the bad Muslims. “

“This is also a great chance to grab as much power as we can. Everybody is behind us either out of anger at what happened or fear of what could happen. We’ve got to act fast to line up things in our favor as much as possible before the feeling ebbs.

“Even the Democrats for God’s sake are stiff as boards. We yell boo and they’ll jump a foot. We’ve got the citizens by the balls if we grab them right.”

Cheney soaked in their enthusiastic applause when he finished. He was especially pleased that there was not an once of rebuttal against anything he had said.

“McGurty,” Cheney reached out and grabbed his arm before he got too far away, “I need to talk to you for a moment.”

He could see that the new head man was serious. He gave him his full attention.

“This is confidential. Only you and me are talking, OK?”

“Got it.” It made him nervous, but long political experience gave him a poker face to cover all his range of emotions, especially fear.

“I’m going to need to get rid of Hastert.” He stopped to let this sink in. It looked like it came to James as a surprise, but not as a shock. “He’s not going to work for me. I need someone with a little more spunk. I don’t want a VP who is just going to sit on his hands.”

‘Who do you want for this?” asked James.

“I want Tom DeLay. He has the sort of brashness that I will need. I need someone who can be a plow and not a picnicker.”

“That will take some doing. It would be easier if Hastert had done something we could throw mud at. Is there anything?”

“Nothing that would make it stick. I think the conservatives would go with us just to have a strong candidate.”

“We sill have to move quick before Hastert gets too cemented into his job.”

“Let’s get moving on it then. I want DeLay in the White House as quickly as we can.”

“Yes sir. I’ll get on it.”

Cheney went on his busy was, leaving McGurty standing there to figure out exactly how he was going to pull this one off.

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Homeland Security Warns of “Out-For-Blood” Radical Group Calling Itself “Red Cross”


WASHINGTON — The Department of Homeland Security released a statement yesterday afternoon warning U.S. citizens of recent efforts by a group of homegrown radicals whom officials say are “out-for-blood.” Reports indicate the organization is calling itself Red Cross.

According to sources, the group’s signature act of torture involves draining the blood from humanitarians unfortunate enough to find themselves on a Red Cross “tablé” (pronounced taw-blay or tay-bul), which is a device not unlike the infamous “rack” used in the Spanish Inquisition. Read the full story

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Jet-Wheel Stowaway Forces Airports to Increase Security Illusions


SAN JOSE, CALIF. — Following a 15-year-old boy’s recent stowaway ride across the Pacific Ocean, authorities at San Jose International Airport say they plan to work with the FAA in an effort to step up their security illusions, sources report.

According to San Jose International Airport Spokesperson Janet Bavory, “Our illusions of security failed us this time. In the future, however, we vow to increase the number of pretend security measures in order to make sure that such a devastating terror attack doesn’t almost happen ever again.” Read the full story

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Jihadist Gets The 72 Virgins That He So Richly Deserves


The Gates To Glory opened wide to accept young Jasheed as he entered the Jihadist Heaven he worked so hard to deserve.

His trainers had always indoctrinated him on the wonders that would await him there were he to prove himself to be a true fundamentalist patriot.

Now, his mission completed and multiple bodies torn apart by his suicide bomb including his own, he had now come to get his awards. Read the full story

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Obama Promises Drone Strikes are Not “Lip-Synced”


WASHINGTON D.C.–Following the controversial lip-syncing performance by singing sensation Beyonce Knowles at the inauguration a couple weeks ago, a pall of skepticism has hung over much of the administration’s policies and decisions, both current and past.

One seldom discussed but extremely crucial aspect of his legacy is at the forefront: the ongoing and widespread campaign against terror in Yemen, Pakistan, and Afghanistan. Read the full story

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History’s Largest Manhunt Over, Waldo Dead


Aden- The largest manhunt in the war on terror finally comes to a close. Waldo, a.k.a. Wally, Veli, or Al’ Shabaz Mussa Shadif was an American citizen who notably sympathized with Al Quaeda insurgency groups and became an intellectual leader in the movement.

The manhunt started after the U.S. withdrew support of the Mujahideen in Afghanistan, a “slight to the struggle of the Islamic people” by the “imperialists of Washington,” quoted from videos recorded by Waldo while in hiding.

Waldo then took a leadership role in the anti-American activities conducted in the region. Intelligence reports state that Waldo would “hide random objects in various public spaces, most often found by children.” While agencies “would have to redirect focus to find all of these hidden objects before attention could be given on Waldo himself.” These reports also explain how Waldo would taunt law enforcement by “listing how many of these varied objects were hidden in a particular location.”

Although no evidence could be connected with Waldo and specific acts of terrorism, “we know he had a certain level of involvement and an administrative role,” says Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff U.S Army General Martin E. Dempsey.

The search ended when notable Special Forces group, Navy Seal Team 6, carried out a daring night time raid and assassinated the terrorist. Also killed in the raid were Waldo’s wife Wenda, second in command Odlaw, and loyal companion Woof. This raid was conducted soon after the use of predator drones to bomb and kill Wizard Whitebeard at a remote training facility in Pakistan.

According to unnamed sources, the ability to ascertain Waldo’s precise whereabouts were coordinated with Facebook. Facebook was able to help the Central Intelligence Agency with their facial recognition technology, a crucial element to find the seemingly ordinary looking terrorist.

Director of the CIA David Patreas stated that “Wizard Whitebeard was one thing, he fit the profile. Waldo was another case.” He went on to say “Let’s not lose sight of the real victory here, we are keeping Americans safe. The collaborative work of the CIA, Military, and private industry should be applauded.”

The orders to follow through with the assassination came from the president’s office. Barack Obama consented to the infiltration once intelligence reports came back from the precise whereabouts of the known terrorist.

Obama announced that, “justice has finally been served. No longer will American children have to sleep at night wondering where this mad man is. No longer will they have to question if the government can keep them safe from these hidden menaces. We can reassure them that even if a terrorist is hiding on a movie set, a crowded beach, a coven of vampires, or even in what would seem like and endless sea of Waldos, we will find them and kill them.”

A recent member of Seal Team 6, whose identity must be kept a secret, has received much scrutiny for lambasting remarks against President Obama.

He said in an interview, “Obama didn’t kill Waldo, we did. He’s taking credit for the hard work conducted by our servicemen. Our ability to discern whether the target was in fact Waldo or a strategically placed barber’s pole was on our backs.”

Although this would seem like a major victory in the War on Terror, Whitehouse, Pentagon, and CIA officials argue that there are still threats to freedom that still exist in the world. With the death of Waldo and his compatriots, the highest priority to international security agencies is Carmen SanDiego. With her whereabouts still unknown, her ability to elude law enforcement is unprecedented.

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Dick Cheney Blasts Americans for Letting Terrorists Win


WASHINGTON, D.C. – Former Vice President Dick Cheney blamed Americans yesterday for “being in bed with” terrorists. “The people of this nation are as much to blame as their pusillanimous, light-skinned president for delivering the head of democracy to the terrorists on a silver platter,” said Mr. Cheney when he appeared before the steering committee of the American Tea Party. Read the full story

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Posted in Strange People, War ZoneComments (2)

Osama’s Cave Getting Too Crowded


(Information received by word of mouth via the north Pakistan grapevine)

Osama bin Laden’s cave has become crowded beyond capacity due to President Obama’s decision to send an additional 30,000 US troops to Afghanistan. Every Taliban member not busy committing suicide in a crowded place occupied by infidels is pushing to get into the cave as it is the only place where they are guaranteed not to be found by the military. Read the full story

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