Are you in Seattle, or close enough to drive? Would like to take that gun off your hands, no questions asked. Will give you a $100-$200 Amazon gift card for it. Just bring it to me.
Okay, not me, but the Seattle gun buy-back. I don’t want them. Nothing against your guns, I’m sure they’re lovely, well-oiled, and perfectly represent your manhood. No it’s not like that.
Amazon.com and a number of other Seattle-area businesses have chipped in to get guns off the streets.
They’ll take the non-collectibles and melt them down. They’ll give you $100-$200 (depending on the gun) even if you paid less than that to buy them (as I did for the Tek-9 I’ll be turning in. Collectible guns will, it seems, be spared.
So it’s up to you, Seattleite. Would you rather keep that boom-stick, or come get $100-$200 in Amazon goods. Bear in mind, Amazon isn’t just books. I’ve recently bought headphones, fingerless gloves, a power side-mirror and window control switch for my van, and an Annoying Orange plush toy from Amazon… I mean seriously, they have everything eBay does, minus the garbage.
Read all about it here, but it’s only being held on January 26th, 2013, so be ready.
And don’t worry about showing up with such a valuable piece of merchandise. Truth is, nobody in that line would dare try to rob anybody else… I mean, seriously, we all know that all of us are carrying guns!*
* But we all know we’re carrying un-loaded guns, and that everyone walking away is unarmed, so the lack of crime has nothing to do with that. Just wanted to point that out before the gun nuts try to say that being universally armed is a deterrent. The richest people at the thing will be unarmed.**
** And don’t go robbing this event to prove me wrong. If you do, I swear I’ll hunt you down and slap you in the face. I’m not just armed, I’m two-armed, and at the end of both my arms is an open palm, and I won’t hesitate to put it all over your face.