Categorized | Television

Saddam TV Debuts In Iraq to Wild Ululation

Saddam TV Debuts In Iraq to Wild Ululation

A mysterious pirate television channel, calling itself Saddam TV, has begun broadcasting in Iraq. No one knows the source of the broadcast, but American Super Freedom Friend Forces insist it’s surely the work of members of Saddam’s devoted Baath Party. Apparently the programming started exactly three years to the day after Saddam’s execution.

Programming highlights include:

MUSLIM GIRLS GONE WILD!; Fundamentalist babes of the burqa might not lift up their veils, but they definitely will show some serious eye-hole. Check us out at 6:00.

WHO’S ASSASSINATING ME NOW?; Clips of Saddam doubles being offed by discontented Iraqis, though some of them might be Blackwater troops, it’s your call, so text to vote.

IRAQ’S FAVORITE HOME VIDEOS; Hilarious outtakes of American soldiers breaking into Iraqi homes at night to round up insurgents with famous bloopers like “wait, that’s a live baby” and “stop, that infant isn’t a 70-year-old insurgent!”

GREAT MOMENTS AT WAR; Short, five-minute newsreel showcasing Iraqi successes against coalition forces in both Gulf Wars. Many of the highlights include footage from Vietnam, Korea, and World War II (edited for length.)

THE GOOD OLD DAYS; A nostalgic look back at life under Saddam when the only time people got tortured and killed was when they crossed the big guy; when there was money to buy things, houses without holes blown in them, water to drink, power outages that were less than constant, and hobbies other than suicidal Jihad.

HOW TO RUN A COUNTRY LIKE YOUR PERSONAL BANK; El Mustachio himself gives stock and investment tips from footage beyond the grave on how to milk an economy for what painfully little it’s worth, including recession-proof tips like “don’t invest in green energy.”

THE PALACES OF SADDAM; A nightly, years-long series presented each day, highlighting a new, lavish home that Saddam had built for himself, but never got to visit. Special out-take segments are featured from his penile-disabled son before he was killed by coalition forces.

Intelligence personnel investigating the new channel suspect that it drew inspiration from the new movie Pirate Radio that is coming out on DVD now, though many television critics believe Saddam TV more closely resembles MTV’s surprise hit Jersey Shore.

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I was born and I died. Being a disembodied entity makes it very cheap for me to get by. Not having to worry about eating or having a place to live gives me a lot of freedom to squander my time writing occasionally funny articles. See more almost funny stuff at http://inyear252509.wordpress.com/

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