Child Pornographers, Polygamists Fight for First Amendment Rights

In Washington D. C .a handful of people showed up for the Million Man Child Pornographer March led by the Society of Children in Cinema United by Men (SCCUM).

The rally was staged in the conjunction with the Rights for Ancient Polygamous Elders Society (RAPES) gathering to protest the trampling of their First Amendment rights.

Spokesman Elder Skrewie for RAPES said, “Clearly, you let one infringement of our rights pass and the liberals will want to take them all. The Bill of Rights says we have freedom of religion.

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The bible is clear that men can have as many wives as they want, they must obey their husbands, and there is no age limit on this. So we believe God says, old enough to bleed, old enough to breed.

Clearly if the Lord had not meant fourteen year old women, and I mean women, to be married off to well established members of the church then they wouldn’t develop their curse until such a time as the Lord saw fit for them to marry. And Lord knows teenaged girls need the moral and religious guidance of elders to help them develop into fine wives.”

SCCUM Spokesman Slim Morles nodded in agreement. “Anyone with half a brain can read that the First Amendment does not exclude child porn. It says we can express ourselves however we want, no exceptions. We have the freedom of speech, and I am sorry that some kids get hurt, but they are so few when you consider how many kids are hurt by bee stings, getting a time out or having an embarrassing year book photo published.

Many kids love it and they actually look forward to being filmed and getting candy from nice men. And it gives kids a sense of independence to be working and making their way like adults do. It is very empowering. We do it for it the children really.”

Each agreed if they joined forces as a united front of concerned citizens they could do a lot of damage. “We need to stop the tyranny of religious persecution in this country before the constitution is completely shredded,” Elder Skrewie said as a final comment. Slim Morles added before being led away by police, “If you don’t love freedom then go live in Thailand. I did before they deported me, and it was pretty nice.”