Category: The Rest
Breaking Media Tradition: Balloon Boy Was a Hoax
Not ones to mince words, let Glossy News be among the first to openly declare that the balloon boy incident involving Falcon Heene, son of Richard “Big Dick” Heene, was nothing more than a costly, ill-conceived, poorly orchestrated hoax and…
NPR switches to All Pledge Drive Format
Following a highly successful, some might even say “profitable”, pledge drive week, National Public Radio has committed to an “all pledge drive” format to rival their for-profit counterparts. The amount of money the earned during the week was apparently “half…
Tele-Commuter Finds Porn Unavoidable
8-hours work devolves quickly to 6 hours of surfing the net for adult content.
Dems Whip Dems to Filibuster Dem Legislation
By the time the Democratic proposal hit the floor, Harry Reid had already ensured enough Dems would vote to filibuster their own legislation.
Panda Testes Apparently “Quite a Turn Off”, Say Crypto-Aphrodesians
In a surprising turn-around the Sino Council on Virility has rescinded their long-standing endorsement of ground n’ powdered panda junk, citing universal complaints from their users including “smells kinda funky”, “what the hell is this nasty powder,” and “Come on…
Patrick Swayze Abs to be Sold in Creepy Benefit Auction
Famous dirty dancer and proxy child molester Patrick Swayze shuffled off the mortal coil last month, and the fine folks at Sotheby’s have found no better way to pay tribute than by pawning off the cryptic remainder of his abs…
Strong Weather Predicted in a Place
No update as to exact locale. Details to follow.
Triple-Negative Grocer Doesn’t Not Have No Bananas
It’s true, or allegedly so. We’ve had trouble verifying the story for semantic as much as practical reasons.