News-Ruse hereby endorses former Alaska governor and vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin to fill the next vacancy on the U.S. Supreme Court.

We at News-Ruse know that Palin is not a lawyer but the Supreme Court already has lawyers. Look at Clarence Thomas. We believe he is a lawyer, although since he doesn’t talk it is hard to be sure. Continue Reading

Sometimes you’ll see the disclaimer, “No animals were harmed during the making of this film”, at the end of a movie. I think that’s a rather bold statement. I’m watching the movie thinking, “I know for a fact around the time they were making this movie that I ran over a squirrel and accidently locked my cat in a closet over a weekend.” Continue Reading

Everyone knows how stressful an office environment can be. Work can be hard enough without having to deal with co-workers and office equipment. But the hits just keep on coming, and the hours seem longer and longer. The following list contains 15 pointers that will help you survive your days at the office.

TOP 15 OFFICE SURVIVAL TIPS Continue Reading

IMPORTANT – IF YOU ARE NOT A CARD CARRYING MEMBER OF “CONFEDERATION OF SOCIALISTS INTENT ON BRINGING DOWN THE CAPITALIST DRAGON AMERICA”, THEN DO NOT READ THIS…

Comrades!
The situation is dire!
Our plans lay fast in rubble before us!

Our goal to subjugate the great capitalistic tyrant the United States and lead them to the glories of socialism has run aground. The attempt to sneak Marx-Engels philosophies into the pattern of American politics has been uncovered again and again by the ever intrepid FOX News and their highly elite and patriotic staff. Continue Reading

The saying goes “There is more than one way to skin a cat.” No, this isn’t a funny story about a cat. I know, I know, for all you cat lovers out there, maybe there will be one soon, but for now, this is not where to look.

Conan O’Brien once said “During last night’s debate…Kerry and Edwards were so friendly, President Bush accused them of planning a gay marriage.” It didn’t happen, of course. Edwards turned out to be even more heterosexual than we’d originally thought, Continue Reading

It is now an established scientific fact that global warming is taking place around the world. You can see it everywhere. Glacier National Park is melting. Huge slabs of ice in the Polar Regions are dropping into the sea like so many gigantic ice cubes into some cosmic scotch and soda.

The ocean is steadily rising. Pretty soon if you live in Florida you’ll need an inflatable raft to get to your kitchen for a snack. Continue Reading