Rand Paul Reaches Out To Dems, Promises Not to Ban “Washing-up” Agenda

Some Republicans view Rand Paul as a potentially divisive figure (i.e. one who will take some of their support away in critical demographics), but some of his opponents are actually impressed how he has built bridges with Democrats at cross-party meetings.

“You know,” says Rand’s agenda-driven new ally, Barney Frank, “I wasn’t all that sure about our good pal Senator Rand Paul at first, but I’m really impressed at his cooperative spirit. We sit around a table, decide who’s gonna do what, agree about it, and we get down to work.”

Paul even said this division of labor reminded him of that chapter in Adam Smith. Frank agreed with him: “You are so right, Rand!”

Together, they even devised the “washing up” agenda, which is best described thusly:

1. Buy what’s needed.
2. Who’s gonna run the water?
3. Scrub the dishes.
4. Gotta get the tableware dried, yes sir!

Frank said, “You know what, just today alone, we’ve already two down, two to go! You know, you used to hear so many people fussing about whether this agenda or that agenda existed; but now, as far as me and Rand and the other participants in our cross-party discussions are concerned, we can all just sit down and co-operate, with a bit of healthy competition, it’s great!”

But Rick Perry seems to be that little bit less impressed; as he commonly is!

“All right, yeah, tell me another one, so we finally acknowledge at long last that there actually is a washing-up agenda! Well, no surprises there! I’ve been talking about the evil agenda of my enemies all along, 24/7, and so has Rick Santorum! But here’s the million-dollar question; what precisely does this Rand Paul guy plan to do about it, huh?

But Rand Paul doesn’t seem to mind such criticisms.

In fact, he just gets up and walks away from uncomfortable confrontation.

You know, when dishes need washed, someone has to step up to the mark and do what has to be done. Maybe some of my GOP rivals wish they could set the agenda like I can? Or maybe they just can’t stand it when a top Republican reaches out to the Democrats and tries to work together with them.

Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!

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