Categorized | Politics

Controversy as Democratic Party Changes Name

Controversy as Democratic Party Changes Name

In an effort to attract the more diverse crop of voters and political revolutionaries emerging in President Obama’s second term, Democrat leaders announced early Wednesday that their party’s name will be changed to “Socialist-Liberal-Progressive-Democrat-Marxist-Leninist-Maoist Party for Pansexual and Botox Patient Rights” on June 1st.

Nancy Pelosi personally unveiled the new title to the press corps, calling its advent “A refreshing glass of Kool-Aid for us all to consume.”

The former House Speaker has also pledged to show sympathy for unique subcultures of America by identifying herself only as “Newman” from this point forward.

President Obama on the other hand had choice words for those staffers who came up with the name. He said, “Let me be clear: I think the new title is something fantastic and all parts of it apply to me — except for pansexual. I have always been and will continue to be intersexual with a dash of unisexuality.”

Republican reactions have been mixed, though the most defined came from Senator Tate Williams of Arkansas, who launched into a tirade about the threat posed by the new name to family values.

“We cannot look at this through the realm of politics – it has to be about family values. And family values aren’t on the table for negotiation! If we on the Republican side do not see some initiative by the president to drop the hammer and defend family values then it may be time for the South to form a federation of sorts precisely to exalt the sheer decency of those values.”

News agencies are still waiting by for a reaction from the Big Botox Butt Brigade of America’s chairwoman, Kim Kardashian.

Share

This post was written by

- who has written 57 posts on GlossyNews.com.

Washington, D.C. native stuck in the Alps. I use a typewriter and then copy and paste to my computer screen..it doesn't work so well.

.

One Response to “Controversy as Democratic Party Changes Name”

  1. everskeptic says:

    They should change their name to vanilla, even though they aren’t nearlyt as white as the competition. They just don’t do anything. They bring no spice. They just lay down and take it whatever it is.

    I vote straight line dem on the ticket and I hate them so much for being so spineless.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks


Leave a Reply


We are also looking for a satire editor
and a Clever Photoshop Guru...
Check out our friends:
Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Glossy Exclusive Video: How Hot Dogs are REALLY Made
(Comment on this video here)
-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Visit the “Old Version” of our Site

     
Still want more? Find thousands of buried satirical gems in our archives on the old version of Glossy News!

Check This Out!

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

7 posts
3 posts
2 posts
2 posts
1 post


All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial