Gallup: Romney Defeats Truman

GlossyNews.com – Gallup, the oldest, wisest and arguably the most interesting polling firm in the industry, has shown some pretty, shall we say, peculiar results this election season.

But nothing compares to the statement issued 26-minutes ago by Gallup; “Romney Defeats Truman.”

Right: Gov. Romney poses with the paper in hand, reveling in his unexpected victory. (CLICK PHOTO TO ENLARGE… YOU REALLY SHOULD.)

At one point they broke 7-points for Romney when nine other national firms showed results much, much lower (+3 was the highest, -2 was the lowest,) but they stood by their guns, even though they looked more like Super Soakers ready to be turned back on them.

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But this announcement, which I now see has already been deleted from their website, seems to fly in the face of even the most conservative polls. For one thing, Harry Truman died in 1972 (or as Unskewed Polls adjusts it, 1985.)

Truman Capote? Truman from the Truman Show? Harry Truman? The possibilities are endless, but none of them make any more sense than the other polling issued late in the election cycle by Gallup, so this may just be par for the course.

We will likely learn in the coming days that this was a clerical error, as we did with the infamous “Dewey Defeats Truman” headline, but little can be done to restore the honor and integrity of this periodically-great institution.

I mean, we’re a satire site, but even we have standards… We don’t enforce them, and they’re frequently abused, as in this case, but we do have them.

Author: Dexter Sinistri

Dexter Sinistri is a famously centrist writer who has worked as a Hollywood correspondent for a number of leading publications since 2005. Though once a photographer, Mr. Sinistri struck out as a writer on all things celebrity, and he likes to consider himself a tremendous asset to Glossy News, though by most accounts, he has fallen somewhat short of this effort.

7 thoughts on “Gallup: Romney Defeats Truman

  1. With their likely voter model they could call just about anything… but in just a few short hours we'll know the final answer. Who is right, who is wrong, and who is so skewed as to lose credibility.

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