Obama Thinking A Mohawk Might Help w/ Campaign Donations

Washington, DC – (SatireWorld.com)

Bobak Ferdowsi, the “Mohawk guy” who worked on NASA’s Mars Curiosity rover landing has a famous new fan. Last week, President Obama said he’s been thinking about emulating him and having his Chicago barber style his hair in a Mohawk style.

“Ferdowsi was one of many NASA scientists who anxiously waited as the rover landed on Mars during a dramatic descent via parachute and some rocket thingy,” Obama said in a phone call with scientists of NASA’s Jet Propulsion Lab.

“In the past, I’ve thought about getting a mohawk myself, but my team keeps discouraging me,” he joked. “Now that Ferdowski is receiving marriage proposals and thousands of new online followers, I’ll have to go back to my re-election team and see if I can grow longer hair by November and perhaps I can raise a few more campaign dollars in the meantime.”

Obama’s barber doesn’t like the idea. “It mean’s I’ll have to fly out to Washington weekly to keep a cut like that fresh looking. I have a family and everything!” Said Zarif, Obama’s longtime personal groomer. (or was that Choomer?)

After all finding and keeping a good hairdresser or barber can be a tough task. But according to past and current reports, it hasn’t been a problem for President Barack Obama, who allegedly flies his Chicago barber Zarif to Washington, D.C., twice per month to cut his hair on a government jet.

Despite this scandalous claim, it seems his barber, Zariff, is refusing to provide details about his travel and guest arrangements with the White House other than the President is a lousy tipper, cheats at golf, and keeps hitting him up for more and more campaign contributions.

Obama’s team has had a recent change of heart over the Mohawk issue and have noted the political expediency in helping fellow Democrat Elizabeth ‘Pocohantas’ Warren with her troubled senate race in Massachucetts. Warren who claims, but has no proof, that she is of Native American heritage. Others say her claims are bogus and she merely used a made-up Native American heritage to secure jobs and appointments.

According to Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, “Having Barack wearing a Mohawk haircut would show a connection to our Native American brothers and sisters. Besides, we could raise at least another million dollars or so from Mister T!”