Discount hotel chains nationwide plan to leave the light on for a new breed of budget-conscious traveler—America’s most wealthy citizens.
After Dr. Hamilton Lempert, a Cincinnati emergency room doctor, conveyed to NPR that expiration of the Bush tax cuts at the end of this year would result in a $20,000 personal tax hit and cause him “ … to decide what to do for vacation …”, economy hotels immediately blitzed advertising campaigns targeting the nouveau deprived.
For those for whom “A Little Rain Must Fall”, Super 88 plans installation of rainfall shower heads in all hotels located off the Interstate highways.
Motel 66 has reportedly reached a deal partnering with a major coffee company to launch the “Your Bucks Stops Here” promotion. One dollar grinds and perk perk perk perk perk perks a fresh cup of Seattle java from coffee vending machines located at the end of every hallway of every 66 in the country.
La Kinta Express plans employ of on-site dog groomers specializing in pedigreed breeds while Econo-Dodge Suites hopes an on-site sommelier will attract the wayside weary harboring a penchant for the grape.
“Let’s us fend your Fendi!” is the new motto for Red Tin Roof Inn.
Although luxury hotels have reported an increase in holiday reservation cancellations by those who received the greatest benefits from the Bush tax cuts, keepers of more modest establishments are wildly optimistic over the expected trickle-down effect.
“I’m hoping for no room at the inn!” exclaimed Extended Play manager Bob Jones. The two star hotel will provide faux mink mangers for families traveling with babies at Christmas.