A dead frog
A used band-aid
A squashed and leaking Ketchup packet.
Toe nail clippings
Dozens of baby roaches
A slice of bacon
A used Q-Tip
A used condom (and it was in a Bible!)
A grilled cheese sandwich
Toilet Paper (and this happens ALL the time..)
An ad for lap dances (in a children’s book!)
Questionable food stains
A dirty diaper
A slice of bologna
Attention library patrons! The next time you’re tempted to mark your place in one of our books with insects, snacks, porn or anything that used to be part of your body? Please do us library workers a big favor and JUST DOG-EAR THE BLEEPING PAGE!
(Roz Warren is the author of Our Bodies Our Shelves: Library Humor and Just Another Day At Your Local Public Library: An Insider Looks At Library Life, both of which you should buy immediately).