Categorized | Crime, Top Stories

Northern Proverbs: Drug ‘Em Up Like a Raet Smack’ead

Northern Proverbs: Drug ‘Em Up Like a Raet Smack’ead

Northern England has the best proverbs.
Trust me.
You’re gonna love ’em!
All these wise sayings.

Crack before port, is a well good snort.
Port before crack, brings all ’em shite times back!

Coke before ganj, yer the next Nicki Minanj!
Ganj before coke, yer a fuckin’ jawwwwk!

Pills before beer, us Nirvana’s near!
Beer before pills, oooooo! But int it merry ‘ell!

MDMA before DXM, yer enjoyin’ ’em.
DXM before MDMA, yer on t’ feel raet gay!

Note: One of these jokes appears in my as-yet-unpublished satire novel on the ‘Men’s Rights Movement.’ Rainbow Jez and the Death of Men.

But can you guess which one?!


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Sub-editor of Glossy News. Contact me to pitch or submit your satire! You can buy my satire and poetry ebooks from many online stores, including Amazon. Make sure you like the Glossy News and Wallace Runnymede pages on Facebook!


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