NHL Lockout Takes Center Stage at Debate

Undecided voter Mervin Dodson of Hempstead, New York was sadly disappointed by his participation in Tuesday night’s Presidential debate.

“Of course I was thrilled to be selected as one of the dozens of undecided voters to participate in the debate,” said Dodson.

“Who wouldn’t be? It was a chance for me to question both candidates on what I think is one of the most important issues of the day.”

Luckily for Mr. Dodson, he did get to present his question at the town hall meeting held on the campus of Hofstra University located in Nassau County, Long Island. Sadly, he did not get the answer he was hoping for.

“You see, I’m a longtime New York Islanders fan,” said Dodson. “And I’m finding it difficult to deal with the current suspension of the National Hockey League season due to the owners’ lockout and I was hoping one or both of the presidential candidates would be able to help.”

According to Mr. Dodson, his question was brief and easily comprehensible. The debate transcript confirms his opinion which shows his question as follows: “If you are elected President on November 6th, what steps would you take to end the NHL lockout?”

Unfortunately, neither candidate was able to answer the question to Mr. Dodson’s satisfaction.

“Obama just looked at me like I was from another planet and said he had no idea what an NHL lockout was and took a pass. At least Romney tried to answer but he thought NHL stood for the Natural Health League and went off on a tangent about alternative medicine and how it was so much better than Obamacare.”

Moderator Candy Crowley did try to intervene and clarify Mr. Dodson’s question but ultimately was unsuccessful.

“I believe NHL stands for the National Hockey League and that the questioner is concerned about some current strike or other. Is that right, sir?”

Even given that clarification, the candidates were less than responsive.

“That’s the game they play with skates and sticks, right?” said President Obama. “Sorry, don’t have a clue about that.”

“Unlike the President, I do have some familiarity with ice hockey,” said Governor Romney. “Since I helped save the Salt Lake Winter Olympics back in 2002 and I believe ice hockey was one of the sports. Hope that helps.”

As of today, Mervin Dodson remains undecided.

Author: Dave Martin

Dave Martin's humor and political satire have appeared in many major North American newspapers including The N. Y. Times, The Washington Post and The Chicago Tribune. His latest humor collection is entitled "Screams & Whispers" available on Amazon.com and he blogs at www.davespoliticalsatire.blogspot.com.

2 thoughts on “NHL Lockout Takes Center Stage at Debate

  1. If he had stressed it was “union related” he would have gotten both of them fired up!

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