Tag Archive | "spirituality"

I am Not Unity, and I am Not Division


The only thing to be afraid of is fear itself.

Be good to the one person who needs your respect and gentleness more than any other person.

A million friends and family cannot carry the burden that your one caressing hand can bring you.

Many loves begin and end, but by cultivating your own narrow little garden, forests unseen shall bloom, carried forth in splendor by the wings of the wind.

Share

Posted in Human Interest, Serious CommentaryComments (0)

Scientology Sex Toys Taking Over Our Godly Galaxy!!! (3/3)


Phew! I’m worn out.

Or maybe just in a vaguely soporific state.

It was all fun and amusing to start with, but I think the novelty’s worn off.

Gets a bit samey after a while.

Still, I always like to honor my purely fleeting, voluntary and radically contingent contractual commitments to the international-satire-misreading-and-red-herring-web-comment-community. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Making Headlines, ReligionismComments (0)

Scientology Sex Toys Taking Over Our Godly Galaxy!!! (2/3)


OK, the sky hasn’t fallen in….

Yet.

Just gotta keep going, I suppose.

Cosmic E-Cheek Ass Slicer

OK, this one is a little bit nastier, if also somewhat more fun…

And it’s only for the more experienced, intrepidly kinky fetish types. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Making Headlines, ReligionismComments (0)

Scientology Sex Toys Taking Over Our Godly Galaxy!!! (1/3)


Oof! Sorry for the mildly sensationalist headline. I never quite got over not getting to be a top reporter for the Galactical Enquirer.

Still, somewhat more crucially, I must inform you of the existential spiritual peril facing you and your family. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Making Headlines, ReligionismComments (0)

Weed-Smoking Potlandians Debate Whether to Legalize Nicotine, Alcohol


Dateline: CANNABISTOWN, PO—In Potlandia, marijuana is legal for recreational purposes and is commonly smoked by nearly all of the adult citizens of that country, while alcohol and nicotine are banned. But the alcohol and tobacco industries regard Potlandia’s laws as discriminatory. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Health, ReligionismComments (10)

Trustafarians on Spirit Quest Disappear in Jamaican Jungle


Kingston, Jamaica (GlossyNews) — The disappearance of two Trustafarians in the jungles of Jamaica has sent a mild panic through wealthy families in the U.S., who sort of wonder where their own dreadlocked dodos might be hanging out.

A few days ago a group of lawyers from Manhattan were talking about doing something to find these 32 year old kids, but outside of a call to the U.S. Embassy in Kingston that went unanswered after 117 rings, not much else was done. A spokesman for the attorney’s group said the search was called off by the 5:00 cocktail hour. Read the full story

Share

Posted in ReligionismComments (2)

IKEA To Accept Souls As Currency


In a bold attempt to increase sales, Swedish furniture retailer IKEA has announced that it will soon allow customers to sign away their mortal souls in exchange for store credit. Those whose souls are not wholesome enough to afford more expensive items will be advised to pray before making their final purchase in easy to assemble pews located throughout the stores. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Biz NewsComments (0)

Glossy News Exclusive Exposés


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Podcast


(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)


More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Check This Out!

ca-dress.com shop dresses online

Recommended Sportsbook MyBookie.ag

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)



All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial