Tag Archive | "Royal Family"

Purr Gate


David Cameron coughed up a fur ball this week when he told ex-mayor of New York, Michael Bloomberg that the Queen “purred” when she had heard the result of the Scottish Referendum.

During this conversation it has also been revealed that whilst the Queen purred like a cat, Prince Philip could be heard barking like a raving lunatic in a basket of used tissues.

“So she was purring, right?” says Cameron “I then I thought one of the corgis had got her but then it shouted out something racist.” Read the full story

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Crappy UK Website Denies Breaking News Princess Diana Was Murdered


“We didn’t break that news,” stated www.cafespike.com site administrator Martin Shuttlecock. “Somebody probably got us confused with the Daily Mail. Or the Express. Whatever.”

Inside information has revealed that cafespike.com is staffed by a team of enthusiastic amateurs who are usually too drunk or stoned to file copy, and British Intelligence services (MI5 & MI6) today dismissed the site as “frivolous and extremely silly.” Read the full story

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Wills and Kate® (Patent Pending)


LONDON (AP) — GlossyNews.com – Wills and Kate®, a royal pair if ever there was one, is the official copyrighted name of the British Royal Family’s new world tour idea.

Set to run through 2011, the tour will begin in Canada on June 30 – with an overnight at the Arctic Circle Hilton; move to California on July 8 for two days at Disneyland; thence proceeding around the globe. Read the full story

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American Spoof Writers Raked Over Coals by Queen Elizabeth


Those closest to Queen Elizabeth are saying that she is becoming quite upset with the way American satirists are cashing in on the upcoming nuptials between her grandson and Kate Middleton. Although she has long gotten over the rude treatment she has personally received from satirists for years, the Queen’s beef is against American writers who have no idea how to write a decent spoof that sounds remotely like a Brit would have written it. Read the full story

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UK Austerity Hits Royal Wedding Plans in the Face


Great Britain was left devastated today by the news that the government’s planned public spending review would be extended to include the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton next month. Until now the British public had born the news that their hospitals, schools, libraries and armed forces were to have their budgets slashed with gritty stoicism.

However news that the lavish celebrations for the marriage of the third in line to the throne, also funded by the taxpayer, were to be hit resulted in an outpouring of emotion. Read the full story

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