Tag Archive | "irony"

Mourner of Paul Walker Attacked over “Irony”


VALENCIA, California – Those close to Paul Walker and people just trying to get on the news gathered at a memorial for the “Fast and Furious” actor who had died in a single-car crash with his friend in Valencia.

He was a passenger in the vehicle. With heads held low, everyone couldn’t help but say, “I can’t take how ironic this is!”

In the crowd of mourners was Daniel Trip (20), an English Major from Cal State Northridge, who at first sensed that the other memorial attendees were trolling, perhaps having an inappropriate laugh. Trip went around asking to see if anyone could explain in what way that the actor’s death was ironic. Read the full story

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Posted in Celebrity Gossip, Human InterestComments (0)

It’s Not Easy Robbing Banks These Days


“God I hate banks,” said the young businessman who was taking his lunch hour to deposit his pay cheque while the company he had started with worked out the details of his direct depositing.

“Why the hell do we have to wait in line for three goddamn hours to put our money in their banks so they can make money off of us? I should be able to do this on my phone. *%&%, I can practically drive my phone but I can’t put money in the bank? Bull%&%#, I call bull@!&#.” Read the full story

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Posted in Human InterestComments (0)

Gynecologist Can’t Believe His Luck with The Ladies


Local doctor Rory Allen, who recently completed his residency and entered private practice as a gynecologist, declared today that he can’t get over his recent good run with the opposite sex. Bespectacled Allen, 27, who admits that he’d always been a bit of a loser with the girls, says that lately he can believe how many women are throwing themselves at him. Read the full story

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Posted in HealthComments (2)

Professional Sport Career Allows Man to Enjoy Data Entry Hobby


Local man, Clive McNeish, revealed today how fortunate he feels being paid a reasonable annual salary for just two hours work a week as a professional squash player. This leaves a full 38 hours a week free for McNeish to indulge himself in his unusual hobby of data entry at Drudge Corp. Read the full story

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Posted in Human Interest, SportsComments (2)

Karma: Riot Cops Gas Themselves


Eighteen trainee officers have suffered burns to the faces, gone blind and had their lungs permanently damaged during a CS gas spray training exercise for the Greater Manchester Police’s ‘Riot Plod Squad’. The rookie recruits – hired from the redundant ranks of New Labour’s quango Renta-Thug sadist agency – were made to walk through clouds of the chemical mist to experience what it would be like to be ‘herding and kettling’ crowds of unruly jobless peasant demonstrators and other domestic terrorist types without the protection of gas masks. Read the full story

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Posted in Crooked Cops, Human InterestComments (0)

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